One Practice to Overcome Obsessive Thoughts
Most people who get stuck with obsessive thoughts, or people who have an anxiety condition (where their brain is constantly thinking anxious thoughts), fail to realize that this condition is a “symptom” and not the problem itself. They keep trying to treat the symptom without acknowledging the real problem. They look to try to solve […]
Link back to full article: https://www.calmdownmind.com/overcoming-obsessive-thoughts/
I have a fear of blushing. I blush easily in social situations. I have a hard time accepting my blushing especially in situations with people around me. I try to stay in relaxed awareness when I blush but its a little bit difficult.
When other negative feelings arise when I’m alone I’m aware of them and they just dissolve. But it’s harder when I’m around people. Do you have any suggestions?
Hi Sen,
Totally understanding your point when I relate it to my condition.As you said in some posts that life energy – that is six dimensions of mind is truly natural and in balanced condition.In my case I might have unconciously supressed “fear” for long time and suffered from symptoms of imbalanced supressed fear in the form of obsessive thoughts.Now when I got insight from your posts I acknowledged the technique of relaxed awareness.And I am trying to flush out my supressed fear in the form of thought by concious acknowledging the thoughts in a neutral manner i.e I am okay with the obsessive thoughts and assuming if you want to be present in my concious its okay.i am totally allowing it to flow through my concious by putting zero resistance to it.
In this process i am getting fatigue and light feverish type.I hope this is the process of undergoing detox state or releasing negative energy that is accumulated in the body.Hope I will be able to feel the clear concious after this process.
Kindly reply If I am anywhere wrong in the process of releasing negative energy.
Thanks.
Ashish, the release of suppressed emotional energy is like a real detox for the body, and it’s energy centers get re-vitalized and revamped during this release – it’s normal for the body to feel fatigue (and possibly some aches or even a feverish sensation) during a release cycle because it involves a lot of “inner work”. Be sure to not over-task yourself by trying to be forceful in the process of allowing, be easy on yourself and follow your inspirations to chill out and take break (even through some distractions) now and then, don’t get too serious about it.
First off all, I must say thank you for this article. My OCD began flaring up quite badly in September, and though things certainly calmed down a bit on their own, without reading this I would probably still be going in circles. Sure, I’m far from my goal as I’ve only been doing this a few weeks now, but I’ve already felt that bliss. Sometime last week, it was like I was a whole new me, if only for a short time. It’s certainly a task, letting everything go, especially when I’ve adjusted to finding ways to supress the feelings, which I now realize is only perpetuating the problem. I don’t know how long this will take, and I’m sure it varies from person to person, but I’m now in this for the long haul. It certianly seems like Groundhog Day, where each day I begin to relax into myself (some days better than others) and by the end of most nights, I feel quite secure. Then of course, the next day I sort of start over again, I guess with a new batch of negative energy. But I’ll never let that get to me anymore. OCD has tampered with my enjoyment of music, daily activities, social interactions, etc, and it feels amazing to know I might finally be releasing this madness from my mind. Thank you again for this wonderful article!
hi sen, i m really really thankful for your articles … they are great …thank you
i please want you to give me little guidance here.. and thank again for giving your time.
I m a 12 passed student and i have taken one year break after my schools for preparation of engineering exams.
I really want to a student at IITs.
and for preparation i was going well. – studying 13- 14 hours per day sincerely and i was really enjoying my days.
but once i was not able to sleep because of “maths and physics” and got a thought that ” what if i didnt sleep ? – i will not be able to follow tomorrows’ study time-table!! ” and i got a little fear- and this fear in few days resulting in ” obsessive thought ” .
and now i feel very sad and dull because when i try to solve a question then their comes a thought that i will not be able to solve it and it takes a quite a strong determination to concentrate on the question and its solution.
but u know it is not easy to study with such “struggle”.
MY EXAMS ARE IN APRIL i really want to do something in my life in science field..
it has been a month since my struggling.. i am feeling quite “stable”… but i just wanted to know that if this fear will “dissolve” or not… u know i m in a very “negative” situation.
please say that it is possible… because i need confidence these thoughts are “acceptable” and that to with happiness and joy …
and i would really be thankful to you if you can give some guidance or “flash of light” on how to use our minds efficiently and skillfully in studying without “struggle”……
thank you .. your reply is important for me .. thanks once again. 🙂
Tapesh, some thoughts have a practical value – like a thought that disturbing your sleep cycle may not be prudent as it can disturb your study routine, now this a practical thought which you can just use as a guidance towards ensuring that you maintain an organized schedule for your exam preparation or you can also discard this thought and experiment with different sleeping times, as a conscious choice – both are valid options. The problem is when you bring an imbalanced fear into the equation and start wasting your energy on this fear. The simple pointer is to no longer keep identifying with this thought of fear, if you keep fearing it it stays in your consciousness, if you simply stop giving it credence it simply dissolves on its own. The reason this thought is affecting you is because you are too nervous about your exams because of some rigid thinking you have about it, making it something that determines your life’s success – remember that an exam (or getting into a particular institution) may be of relative importance but it’s not the end of line, we put too much pressure on ourselves for no reason, there are many avenues through which you can express your love for science and many institutions where you can get quality education than a specific institution you have in mind. You may be putting undue pressure on yourself because of a narrow manner of thinking and this situation is like a pointer for your to be more relaxed in life and more open in your thinking.
The way I see it, learning and understanding a subject is a matter of “practice”, the more time you spend with a subject the more mastery you gain with it – it’s a simple logical truth. Even if you don’t understand certain intricacies about a subject, if you simply keep spending time being with the subject you will start gaining a deeper understanding. In the brain, understanding happens in layers, so don’t be frustrated if you are not able to understand some portions of what you are studying, if you just continue to stay focused on the subject you will keep gaining deeper understanding with time. Struggle comes when you try to do the unnatural of doing too much too soon, instead of working at a steady pace, knowing the everything takes time including gaining deeper understanding. If you are interested in making science your field, develop the attitude to just spend a lot of time with the subject so that it’s a central part of your thinking – don’t study for the purpose of competition, in that case you will focus more on cramming than understanding, rather study with the purpose of gaining understanding. Every field of study has layers of depth, and your understanding can keep deepening if you stay with the subject with an active interest.
Hi Sen. I certainly appreciate your posts and they really offer me a direction that i can use to alleviate my obsessive thoughts. Thank you!
Let me just briefly mention about my background. I am having insomnia for the past 2 weeks. I realise that the reason for me to be unable to fall asleep is that I keep thinking about stuffs ranging from studies to friends to practically anything when i lie on my bed. Most of these stuffs are negative in nature. I am currently a student studying in an university.
I came across an older version of a similar article (http://www.outofstress.com/stop-obsessive-thoughts/) and my following question is regarding this older version. To deal with negative thoughts, what I am currently doing now is to just say “Ok” to them so that I won’t dwell into them. By doing so, these thoughts seem not to continue to be active in my mind that frequently anymore. However, may I know what are the other ways apart from this that we can choose not to give attention/interest to negative thoughts?
With regards to the post on this website, could you elaborate more on relaxing your awareness?
Thank you.
thanks sen .. thanks a lot. 🙂
Hi Sen.. I am so blessed to be here and thank you for creating this website..
please help me with my problem. i’m 25 years old male from the Philippines.
i have a problem on focusing my eyes. my peripheral vision is so active and because of this when somebody sit beside me my eyes started to stare on their private parts. i been suffering from this for 3months already and every day is a tough day because it’s getting worse. i noticed that even when i was walking on the street my eyes keep staring on men and women’s genitals. most of the time on men genitals because of this some of my relative caught me staring and i became a topic to each one of them talking behind my back that i am gay. but i am not a gay. i just can’t explain to them that i am not in control of eyes..
Hope you can help me for this… Thank you and God Bless!
Pat,
The important thing about this peripheral vision is just let it do what it does. You have already become aware of this pattern in you, which is the first step. The second step is just to allow it to be. For example, when you notice/become aware that you have automatically looked at someone else’s genitals (which is completely normal), just let it be and continue going with your day, don’t worry so much about trying to get rid of it because the harder you try to get rid of it or figure it out, the more attention you are giving to the problem and thus increasing it. So when something like this comes up again, just let it be. If you looked there’s no need to put any more into it and consider it a problem and its quite normal for us as humans to look and see something in the corner of our eye. Even the genital areas can be a big point of interest for our human body and mind to automatically look at.
You are definitely right that the people talking behind your back don’t understand your perspective, and to someone who doesn’t understand your perspective something coming across such as looking at another man’s genitals means gay, when it really isn’t gay.
Again, its important not to give too much attention to making this into a problem, and when you do automatically look just be aware that it happened and allow the fact that it happened. Eventually its momentum will drop naturally and it won’t feel like such a problem anymore. Also, you may see it happening less frequently as its momentum naturally dissolves.
Well I do have this problem where i see something in my day and i obsess over it, its irrational and has no significant meaning. its a thought that ruins my mind, it ruins the future. I try to retract back by reminding myself of happiness. Its frustrating because i cant help myself in the way i want too, its a process , instead of just letting go.
Elias, when you say “its a thought that ruins my mind, ruins the future” there are two layers to it – the thought and your added interpretation/judgment/fear of the thought, this is what it means to get identified with the thought. What’s needed is to let go of getting identified with the thoughts that arise, rather just be open its presence, allowing its movement, allowing the emotional energy (however “negative” it feels) in your body without trying to resist it in any way. When you say “I retract back by reminding myself of happiness” that’s what I mean by trying to “suppress” what arises by contradicting it (in order to get some temporary relief) – you will need to let go of this pattern of suppression and move into the space of openness/allowing in a deeper way.
wow, that was the most helpful article ive read on this. Thanks
Dear Sen,
I am 22 years old and I have been having obsessive thoughts for a little over a month that are (labeled) POCD. Before this I had no idea what anxiety was. But when the thought first came to my attention I became so anxious and fearful/hateful of myself. I couldn’t eat, sleep,talk or barely even function at my job. The thoughts would constantly run through my mind causing very bad anxiety and ultimately, depression. Up until last week I was hopeless thinking that this would be with me for the rest of my life. I was even too afraid to research my issue. But when I stumbled upon your article, it gave me so much understanding, and RELIEF. Especially with concept of the “accumulation of negative energy”. Because about six month prior, I almost lost my relationship with a girl I have been with for six years that I wanted and still want to spend the rest of my life with. that alone caused a lot of hurt, and insecurities in myself. Causing me to obsess myself into this position.
Once I read your article, I immediately put your practice into action. I just went into the state of Total Allowing. The next day, even though the thoughts were still at a fast pace, I felt no anxiousness by the thoughts. Which scared me at first until reread this article. two days past. then three days of what I think was release. I am aware of the thoughts that arise and I allow them to pass with as little resistance as possible. I try to be in a state of Total Allowing as much as possible throughout my day. Sometimes I catch myself (when I can) wrapped up in my thoughts of “What if” s. I’m just really looking forward to another release to make sure its moving in the right direction. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thank you for your insight.
Alex, the state of allowing works in layers, in that it keeps deepening and releasing the accumulated momentum over time. Don’t get too impatient to release it all in one go, it doesn’t happen that way. And if you find yourself being lost to the momentum, now and then, it’s totally fine, just the fact that you are now aware of it means that you are not “totally lost” to it. As you continue in this state of allowing, your awareness also keeps growing, and, with time, you will see that you are not taken in by the momentum of the mind/emotions completely. The pointer for you would be to allow this natural requirement of “time” without getting too impatient, without getting too hard on yourself for being lost to the momentum now and then – know that your awareness and the openness will keep increasing over time.
Do you think this can work for misophonia. Its when the sufferer hears certain everyday sounds (which vary from person to person), and they trigger an intense and involuntary anxiety and rage – a flight or flight response if you will – even though consciously they may be aware that these sounds cannot hurt them, and are not being made to bother them. I have suffered from this for nine years, and over the last two years it has only gotten worse (thanks to a dimwitted friend of my brother and his countless annoying habits). Now I cannot even go out for a walk, watch a movie, hang out with my friends, go to any kind of public place, or listen to most of my favorite songs without being constantly triggered. I had to take a few semesters off from college because of this. Its a nightmare, and no one seems to know exactly how this works or how to go about fixing it because it is just starting to be recognized. Do you think this energy detox (or anything else you may have written) applies to this?
Also, to clarify, I am aware of how this problem came about (though I was not aware of it when it developed). I took my great life for granted, I allowed ungrounded hatred to develop, I obsessed over negative thoughts relating to these hatreds, reacted to the feelings that came up, or pushed them down, I kept giving my power away, kept repeating a very sad story to myself that had no happy ending, and as a result, the things I enjoy doing have been turned into stress traps. I am alone most of the time (I would rather not be), shut up in the house with white noise playing sometimes. I understand this is not healthy, and I try to get out once in a while, but every time I do it ends up not being worth it, as the trigger sounds keep popping up. Even just being in a situation where a trigger sound COULD happen puts me in a constant state of paranoia. The reaction is literally faster than the speed of thought. I also understand that my brother’s friend is not responsible for my misphonia developing into a worse problem than it already was; I was the one who let him get to me. At the time I did not understand how this works. Even with a basic understanding now, sometimes new sounds still manage to manifest into triggers. I don’t know if this sounds crazy or not, but anyway, theres the short version.
One thing I’ve recently been doing when trying to stay conscious and I feel a surge of negativity, is I recite long monologues from shakespeare , concentrate on that, and let the negativity flow through me. It helps me to stay conscious, or at least thats how it feels in the moment. Do you think this sort of thing would draw too much attention from the negativity or something like that?
hi sen,I have the same “What if” problem as Alex, for example I took an English class up, and I was really confident in speaking and I’ve always been volunteer for speaking English in the class, till a “What if” question ruined everything .(what happens if I can’t speak like before?)and then I couldn’t speak like before and it scared me, so step by step I lost my confidence and now every section I go to class I’m anxious, and other examples, and for me the problem is not just about thinking, the effects of thinking on my life and on my confidence and my identity makes it harder to relief of thinking.
Nastaran, there is something called “unconscious confidence” where you feel confident because you don’t have a higher awareness, rather your ignorance defines your fearlessness – similar to how a drunk feels more confident in parties because his awareness has reduced. However, unconscious confidence is driven by low awareness, sooner or later your awareness is bound to wake up more, it’s part of evolution – it’s just like how a child grows up, you can’t stay a child forever. When you grow up, there is this initial transition phase which always feels uncomfortable – it’s a shift of awareness. For example, the teenage phase can be seen as a transition phase from a child into an adult, and it can feel challenging because of the changes that happen in the mindset and awareness (of course some stay stuck as a child even in their adulthood, this is because there is no growth in their level of awareness).
So, currently you are in a transition phase, where you awareness has grown but you are yet to adapt to this new awareness because there is still the presence of a lot of past momentum. Higher awareness causes you to become a more perceptive person, you start seeing things in greater detail, you can see the possibilities/probabilities of all the things that can go wrong, you can see the dark nature of reality, you can no longer delude yourself about reality etc, and this higher awareness initially can trigger a lot of fear, mostly because there is no getting away from seeing reality in its details, which will include see all the dark nature aspects along with the light nature aspects. I talk about this in post – the light and dark of conscious living.
In order to live from a place of higher awareness, one has to release the emotional/mental momentum of the past. For example, the fear energy that you feel in your body is what feels crippling right now, and fear gets triggered more because your higher awareness of certain dark nature possibilities in your reality. It’s not about shutting down your awareness, but about releasing the momentum of fear energy so that you are no longer crippled by it, so that you can move inspite of the fear because there is no intensity/momentum to it, in you. You have to go through a release phase where you can release the past momentum, only when you are no longer burdened by this momentum can you function freely from a state of higher awareness – look at the phase of release as a transition phase, it doesnt necessarily feel good to go through a release, but eventually when you get to the other side of it you can start a new level of living, which is the level of conscious living.
Here’s a thing I notice when the negativity starts coming up. When I move my eyes around in circles, the emotions and thoughts seem to become more intense. Would you know if there is a reason for this? Just curious.
Also, there are times when, in the middle of a release, I end up pulling out because it gets too intense and I need to take a quick break before trying again, and I end up not reaching the blissful state. Does all the negativity I felt before pulling out of the release get released, or does the body just push it back down again?
Who are you???!!! I literally could not breathe reading this! I was so overwhelmed..as if you exactly knew what had happened to me…!
The same things happened to me as you described in first few paras…
The feelings of getting wasted, doing nothing in life losing interest in everything, having no sense of purpose had started appearing today evening and no logical thinking and self convincing seemed to work…I finally decided to let go and go dive deeper into the thoughts… bringing up more thoughts on purpose and then SUDDENLY,, life was back to normal.. as if nothing had happened.. as if all tension was released from my body.. In fact for the first time I could ‘small talk’ with my friend without thinking too much about myself or what he thought..
I basically never small talk like women do..(talk effortlessly about any topic) but (I am a male btw..20 years old)…but suddenly I felt amazed at how I could small talk effortlessly with my friend.. no tensed feeling… etc..
I did not know this feeling could be so well explained by some other human being..but you did..
One more fact: this negative energy as you said had come from supressed (trying to control my thoughts) of sexual desires( fantasies ) I had yesterday…Finally I got the connection where the energy came from!( I’m a virgin)
Thank you so much..now Ill read the rest….
Conclusion: Just let the thoughts come and go.. dont force yourself into rationalizing scientifically every negative thought…soon you learn so much.. become free of tension!
Mihir,
India
Hi Sen,
I was wondering if you could help..I suffer from obsessive thinking and I was tired and stressed at work and someone said to me ” you look like your going to stab someone” as a joke I think .Ever since I have had a complex about it and cant even look at myself properly in the mirror, the obsessive thoughts wont go away.Please help me rid these thoughts and feelings
Hi Sophie,
There is nothing wrong with obsessive thinking. Rather obsessive thoughts are the mind’s way of bringing to your attention that there is some energy suppression that has reached a pressurized state within your psyche and is demanding realease. The body uses the same mechanism in the form of pain, to bring to your attention that there is a part of your body that may be in need of healing. From this perspective, neither physical pain, nor psychological suffering is something terrible that needs to be gotten rid of. Rather they are necessary mechanisms that allow you to be aware of what needs your attention. This is the first step, to accepting the obsessiveness of your thoughts.
The second is to recognize that your thoughts have very little to do with reality. Your thoughts are merely signposts that point your attention. The more obsessive the thought the more an indication that your compassionate attention, not fearful rejection, is what is necessary.Allow the thoughts to guide you to a deeper place within yourself that you normally would not have a chance to be aware of.
Become aware of those moments in which you are not obsessing about that thought. Even if they are few and far between, be aware of them. Moments of distraction when you are preoccupied in cooking or watching a tv show or in a joke someone is telling you. In that moment, if you are aware enough you will notice how that negative self-image you have of yourself sismply drops away. Gradually, you will see the connection between your thoughts and self-image. You will see how you literally become this negative version of yourself the moment the thought arises. This is just a means of realizing that this image you have of yourself is not real – because it depends on your thinking to create it.
However, even this recognition will not arrest the momentum of the obsessive thought. The ultimate purpose of this, as I mentioned, is healing. Just like physical pain will continue to draw your attention to a wound in your body that needs your tender attention and care, the momentum of thinking is fueled by psychological pain which is similarly drawing your attention to something that needs healing. That healing can only happen through release of that energy. That realease can only happen if you allow it to.
Allowing is not about trying to control your experience. It is not about trying to avoid your obsessive thoughts, nor is it about identifying with them. One is like the brake pedal of the car, the other is like the accelerator. Hitting the brake may momentarily pause the momentum, but as long as there is still fuel the car keeps running. Take your feet off both pedals and allow the fuel to naturally spend itself. These obsessive thoughts will come to a natural conclusion when you stop obsessing about how obsessive they are. Do you see the connection? Do you see how your fear or denial both serve to equally fuel the fire?
Be patient and compassionate with your mind, especially with its obsessions. It is all a part of a larger mechanism whose only purpose is to bring you to a more whole and complete version of yourself.
That is beautiful, Shiv.
Shiv,
Indeed very beautiful way of explaining. Very good.
thanks,
Anu
Hi, I am currently experiencing a deep depression like I have never before. I am suffering from PTSD, and obsessive thinking also. I have pretty much always had obsessivse thinking and its always been very bothersome. I am trying to allow the feelings and thoughts because i always try to repress them. I think thats why i am where i am now. I dont think i know how to let the thoughts and feelings come without fueling thwm. It seems to me like i should let it happen but be aware that my mind is going through a process? Please clarify or give me some suggestions on how to do this correctly. Thanks
Hi Des,
This pointer of “allowing” can be a tricky one because you can misinterpret it as another technique to try and control your experience. It is important to recognize that ‘allowing’ is not the opposite of repressing or identifying. It is really an attitude of surrendering control.
Try this simple exercise – become aware of the rhythm of your breathing. Watch it closely. You will notice that as soon as you become aware of your breath, its rhythm changes. Suddenly, it goes from a nice, natural rhythm to a sort of controlled artificial rhythm. No matter how natural you try to make it, as long as you are trying to control the experience of your breathing, it will seem unnatural and contrived.
The process of allowing is similar to breathing. It happens naturally. It doesn’t need your active involvement in order for it to happen. But if you try and make it into some sort of objective, then it can become a mechanical and artificial process too.
Your Mind can never know how to allow. It is not built for that purpose. Its job is to identify or suppress, those are its functions. Just as it makes no sense to use a computer to vaccuum a carpet, the Mind is not equipped to allow. At best it can do a sort of pseudo-allowing, kind of like you trying to force your breath to be as natural as possible. This is where a lot of people can get stuck, but it is exhausting and ultimately unfruitful.
Realize this. Allowing is not something you can ‘do’, because allowing is already happening. Right now you are experiencing deep depression. Right now you are experiencing post-traumatic stress disorder. Ask yourself this question – how are you experiencing these? How could these experiences even be possible if it wasn’t already being allowed?
What the pointer of ‘allowing’ is really pointing to is not some new technique for your mind to gain dominion over life, but rather the very intelligence of Life itself, that lies at the heart of every experience. It is pointing to that dimension of your Consciousness that exists even prior to your Mind – prior to the your thoughts, emotions or any other mental events. That Consciousness is the foundation of your whole experience. And it here that the allowing happens.
While depression can feel debilitating, it is also a great opportunity to become aware of this deeper dimension within yourself. Depression and anxiety are tremendous tools for self-discovery, because they temporarily destabilize the mind. And it is in that window of opportunity, when your mind is still scrambling to regain its bearings, that the truth of your being can become even more apparent than ever before.
This is your own inner revolution agains the tyranny of the Mind. The Mind has become an institution – like say a governemnt – built on certain beliefs, principles and motivations. And like most governement institutions it thrives on power and control. Yet this power and control is only apparent it is not real. The power of any governement, no matter how oppressive depends on the people that support it or fear it. The moment the people stop feeding it, the entire structure collapses like a house of cards.
Instead, of trying to build a governement that promises freedom to its citizens (this exactly what is happening when the Mind tries to make ‘allowing’ a practice), recognize that freedom is already inherent within each and every person’s experience. Freedom is already the case. It always has been. Just like you don’t need any goverment to tell you that you are free, you don’t need your Mind’s permission to tell you that you are free.
Go to the source of where the true power lies. Turn to the Consciousness without which the Mind could not even operate. It is a simple state of awareness. It is silent and watchful. You are already very familiar with it. So familiar perhaps, that you do not even realize it. It is your natural state before even a thought arises, before any sense of who you are arises.
Take some time to become present. Just to simply watch your experience as it happens, without trying to get involved, without doing anything, without any agendas. Whether you are sipping a cup of tea, or brushing your teeth, or suffering some obsessive thought, or lying in a deep depressive funk. Whatever the experience is, be quietly aware of it. In doing so, you will find that your perspective has subtly shifted, from being within the Mind, to being the “Witness of your Mind”. This witness position has no opinion, no judgment, no involvement. It is simply aware.
As you become more familiar with this deeper aspect of your Consciousness, you will naturally begin to see that allowing is already happening, whether you like it or not. It has always been the case. Life cannot exist without it, just like your body cannot exist without breathing. The more and more you see this, the more and more you will begin to relax in your attitude towards yourself.
Ultimately, to come to a state of allowing happens when the mind surrenders control and aligns itself with the natural flow of Consciousness. It is the establishment of a true democracy within the mind: a governemnt that places itself at the feet, rather than at the head, of the people. Your Mind is ultimately in the service of Consciousness. Yet, this can only happen when your allegiance shifts from the authority of the mind to the freedom that is inherent within Consciousness.
I obsess over animals being harmed. If I happen to see a photo of an abused animal I will obsess the image for days. I can actually feel the adrenaline pumping through my body as I imagine the image. The more I try to NOT think of it, the more I DO think of it. I realize it is a fact of life and unfortunately abuse happens to animals and humans. Also, why can I look at a photo of an abused child or the elderly and not think another thing of it?
Lis, to feel bad about the abuse is one thing and to feel this strong momentum of physiological reaction in your body is another. Being sensitive is as aspect of you as a human-being, but this strong energy of emotional momentum is owing to the past accumulation of sensitive reactions which got stored up due to a lack of inner openness. Due to this momentum you are now like a prisoner to your own sensitivity where they make you feel helpless and paralyzed, thus making you feel dysfunctional. What’s needed is to move towards releasing this accumulated momentum through the state of allowing. You can read this post – the foundation of openness and the phase of release, to get a sense of what this entails.
I think I am over analyzing what you’re saying or trying too hard. Or maybe i am putting too much stock in this. I am getting really confused. I was laying in bed crying and I was aware of it and tried to watch my experience being that way. When I do that I feel better though. Isnt the aim to just let it be and watch the experience? How can i experience something and witness it at the same time? I never knew about my consciousness before i always just lived in my mind. I feel as though I dont know what my consciousness is or how to be in that state. Sorry to keep pestering.
I remember reading somewhere once that a good massage can aid in the process of allowing, that it lets the imbalances flow more freely through the body (when you start being open). I had also heard the same about stretching exercises. Would you know if there is any truth in this?
Fingaladinga, I’ve found both to be true. Both warm the body and increase the flow of energy. If your work is moving energy for positive growth, that gets a boost. It’s not a substitute for doing the ‘work’ of allowing, but it can put your mind and body in a state that supports it.
Dear Sen…
I am reading your posts for quite a while now and I have found them to be really good. But it has led to loads of confusions in my mind too. I am having this obsessive thought pattern for a while and I want to overcome it. I do want to follow the path shown by you but the circumstances make it difficult for me to go on this path. I am having my exams next month and I am married and five months pregnant too. As you said its basically because of cellular inheritance, does that mean my child will suffer through all this too. ( I personally got this thinking pattern from my mother). What will be the best thing for me to do now? Does release of negativity within my body will affect baby in my womb? And also I am finding it really hard to concentrate on my studies and I desperately want to clear my exams. is meditation of any help in overcoming these feeling? Please help.
Rita, the circumstances in your life are never hindrance to finding balance they are always pushing you towards it, it’s just that we tend to keep fighting what wants to release naturally (or what wants to balance out) and the resisting the maturity that wants to come through. Eventually the deal with obsessing thoughts is that it stems from mind/emotional momentum, it’s simply indicative of the fact that you are afraid of some aspect of thinking and this fear causes you to constantly fight that “thinking” and thus creates a momentum in your mind towards that thinking (this momentum eventually gets stored up as emotional energy in you). The state of allowing is about being totally open to whatever that arises in the mind or in the emotions, in this openness a release starts to happen where all the past accumulated emotional energy comes up to be released, and as the emotional energy gets release the mind momentum also starts releasing in force, eventually dying away totally. Of course, it’s not pleasant to allow this release, mostly because of the deluge of suppressed energy that comes up in this state of allowing, it’s no different from any other detox. You can read the post – the phase of release – for more insight on this.
If you feel that you’ve taken up more than you can handle, then you need to make the conscious choice to let go of certain things for the time being. For example, if you feel that the exams are stressing you out while also being pregnant, you can make the choice of postponing your exams to a later date or taking up the course later. Eventually, you have to make choices towards connecting with a sense of balance in your life, and it can involve letting go of somethings that may be important but not a priority – your sense of relaxation and comfort is more of a priority considering that you are pregnant. Also, the phase of release is a priority in itself for your own sense of balance, and you would need to invest time towards it. It may involve that you have some free time to sit with yourself and to allow the movement of emotional energy so that it can be released – if you are too busy with outside pre-occupation it may not be easy to allow a release, or to deal with a release cycle. Also, the release is a healing process, it’s not an afflicting process.
Gaining an understanding is one thing and the willingness to be committed towards internalizing it (or living it) is another.
Thanks a lot sen for your reply. I guess it was my fear of facing negativity which was creating confusion in my mind. (As I have always believed in positive affirmations and meditation). But now after re reading your number of posts, I understood the whole concept and I have started practicing the allowing procedure . Thanks a lot for clearing my confusions . I will definitely need your further help in this journey to find balance within me. Thank you again.
Hi, this is the first time I’m leaving a comment on a webpage, I’m 16 years old but I’m way more mature of my age, I always thought that I was…well, basically mad and I could correlate with people like Timothy leary or John Nash. I tried many things to keep this madness suppressed and tried eradicating it, I felt like I was the only person dealing with such problems; my brother made me do LSD with him (I had done a lot of research on it previously) and afterwards I felt happy and blissful at every moment of my life. But tonight something strange happened, I confronted my ‘madness’ yet again. I went through the exact symptoms as mentioned here, until I felt a surge of mystical calmness in me, I’ve decided not to go to school tomorrow, and instead explore our garden. So much of peace…