Healing the Imbalance

Posted on by Sen.



If you observe scientifically, you will notice that life-energy is a combination of two polarities, different teachings use different names to define these polarities – yin and yang, masculine and feminine, dark and light, high and low etc. The biggest misunderstanding is to assume that harmony can come by rejecting one polarity and clinging to another – for example, when you cling to the highs and reject the low, you may get a temporary sense of harmony but it’s not long before you start getting imbalanced. A mind is a receptacle of thoughts, and it will naturally have thoughts of both polarities (dark and light), harmony ensues when you can maintain a balance of both polarities instead of trying to squash one over the other. This is the reason why when you are faced by a surge of negative thoughts, you should stay in a place of allowing instead of fighting them – the state of allowing is the “light nature” that can balance the “dark nature” of your negative thoughts, if you try to fight the negative thoughts you end up fueling its momentum because you are now adding more dark energy. It’s not about coming to a place where you are free of one of the polarities, but about coming to a place where “balancing” feels natural to you – this is when you sense a constant inner wholeness as an experience. (The way I define “positive” is a state of balance, and “negative” as a state of imbalance)

What we call “neediness” in a lot of ways is a movement in us to try to balance our inner imbalance, of either light or dark nature, through attaching ourselves, in some way, to an external source – be it an object, spiritual goal, body of work or person. The external source can seem to provide a sense of balance for a while, but the very act of being attached to this source, or dependence, is an imbalance towards light nature (or yin energy as it’s called in Chinese tradition), thus it does not cure your imbalance rather it just ends up amplifying it. An outside source can be used to give you an understanding of balance, but it can’t be used as a crutch to stay dependent on for your balance – sooner or later this very crutch ends up becoming a source that amplifies your imbalance. As an individual life-stream, it becomes solely your own responsibility to bring balance within yourself by balancing both the polarities of energy within you – the balance of yin and yang, dark and light, masculine and feminine, polarities within.

Observing symptoms of imbalance

The act of becoming aware of the symptoms of an imbalance within you, is the first step towards the journey of bringing balance. If you keep denying your imbalances, you simply end up amplifying them on daily basis until they hit a threshold at some point – usually a health problem (including a mental disturbance), financial problem or relationship problem, or all three, is what this imbalance manifests as in our physical nature. Of course, there is the question of a collective imbalance in humans, and the various ways in which it’s manifesting, but instead of worrying about the collective, focus on yourself first – it’s easy to just sit blaming the outside, however unless you take full responsibility for bringing your own balance you are not really aiding in anyway towards a global balance in human consciousness. This the reason why your motivation for balance should always start with yourself first, before you can even express balance into this world.

One has to be very honest to observe symptoms of imbalance within oneself. Your external reality is of great help in identifying your imbalances, because your “experience” of your reality is always a precise mirror of your own state of being. Your external reality is basically defined by your experience of it, two people can be, seemingly, in the same reality but one’s experience may be completely different from the other. For example, two people can receive the same news, and one can go into a state of acute depression/anger, whereas the other may maintain a sense of equanimity – so it’s not the reality as much as your experience of it that matters. And your “response” is totally dependent on how balanced your are within yourself, and state of inner imbalance will always manifest into an imbalanced response. Observe your responses, and experiences, honestly, and you will easily be able to detect all your imbalances. If you constantly keep shifting the blame to the outside, you will have a hard time looking within yourself – balance yourself first and then see how your outside manifests as, and in the mean time work on bringing a balanced response to your outside influences by tuning into your inner guidance/inspiration to the best of your capacity.

Negativity is basically just imbalance, and it can be an imbalance in your light nature (yin) or your dark nature (yang). Examples of imbalance in your yin energy are neediness, over-sensitivity, meekness, victim-mindset, while examples of imbalance in your yang energy are over-indulgence (greed), aggression, arrogance, exploitative-mindset. People who live in fear need a balance in their dark nature (yang energy), which they have been suppressing. People who live in hatred need a balance in their light nature (yin energy) which they have been suppressing. It’s actually very simple when you see it this way, it’s not complicated stuff – it’s just about the movement of balancing the polarities within you. Even the Ego (the sense I in the mind) is not negative by itself, it’s just that it can be imbalanced towards dark or light nature and thus become a “negative” force – when the Ego becomes too self-obsessed it moves into an imbalance in dark nature, when it’s too self-sacrificing it moves into an imbalance in light nature, both lead to suffering.

Instead of getting too obsessed with the “symptoms” of imbalance, just bring a scientific view to it and see it as a temporary manifestation that’s indicative of inner work that needs to be done in you to bring the required balance.

The state of allowing and its balancing influence

The pointer of “allowing” is to allow your imbalance to be healed by the already balanced life-energy available in the space of being. Basically, this balanced life-energy is what I call “wholeness” and it can infilerate, and bring the same wholeness to your physical being; and you can become open to allowing it to “touch” you the moment you let go of your struggle and just relax into a state of openness. This balanced life-energy is called different names in different teachings, its called “Chi” in Chinese tradition, and called “pure consciousness” in western teachings – if you let go of your mindset of struggle and simply allow yourself to be in a state of total allowing of what arises, you become open to allowing this balanced life-energy to touch your imbalances, and thus bring them to balance. The way a balance is created can vary – sometimes the balance is created by guiding you towards an understanding, sometimes it’s created without any external understanding. The state of balance is always “reached” by moving into a state of allowing within.

Initially, as you become “allowing”, you move through the layers of gross imbalance (if you’ve lived a highly unconscious life in the past) within you – and this can feel quite unsettling as the suppressed imbalances (negativity) are touched by consciousness, it’s like bringing a strong torch light into a dark room to become witness to the mess inside. As you move through this phase of allowing your gross imbalances to find balance, you will eventually start becoming aware of subtler and subtler imbalances – the advantage is that with some “experience” you become more and more stable in your state of allowing, to the point where it starts feeling like your second nature. When you start sensing that this state of allowing (within) is becoming your second nature, you start feeling a sense of “confidence” towards handling your life, a sense inner stability sets in.

It’s important to realize that the state of allowing is not a “bliss ridden” state from the onset, the bliss that you are seeking is the state of inner wholeness that you come to when all your imbalances (at-least the gross ones) have been balanced out – not only the imbalances in the mind (the thinking) but also the “stored” imbalanced energies in your emotional space, or body space. So don’t get too confused when you sense a surge of negativity within you when you initially become “allowing”, it’s just an indication of how much of it was suppressed within. The reason I constantly give this pointer of being okay with the initial unpleasantness is because most people get “put off” by it and think that they are doing something wrong. If you are really open to this state of allowing, you will notice that your dark and light nature seem to start balancing, and this can create changes in your attitude and approach to life – for example, as the imbalance of light nature in the form of “neediness”, or even meekness, starts dissolving your approach to several aspects of your life will start changing. Your balanced version will feel very different to you, physically and mentally, like the birth of a new person.

The deal is that the state of balance automatically solves the problems of your personal reality – that’s why it’s called the state of being free of problems, which is nothing but a mind that’s free of seeing reality from yang nature (dark nature) of making it into a problem, neither are you seeing it with “rose tinted” glasses from your yin nature (light nature) as a means of denial, rather it’s seen in a very open manner which you can only experience when you sense this balance in yourself. Trying to explain it in words will cause your mind to perceive it in a dark manner or a light manner depending on the imbalance you have going, so it’s best to just suggest that you find out for yourself by coming to a balance within you. The problems of an “imbalanced mind” cannot be sorted out through quick-fix advices, pep talk, or techniques, it can only be solved when it can reach a balance for itself – it’s a personal journey. Instead of trying to sort out your external reality through an action oriented approach coming from an imbalance mind, take the time to allow your inner space to be balanced out first, it’s the best investment in time you can ever make and it pays rich dividends – it solves your problems without “trying” to solve them.




Related Articles

 

23 Comments

  1. rossana

    beautiful

  2. Casey

    Sen,

    I feel really fortunate to have found your insights this week. I’m trying to let go and disassociate from a harmless obsessive thought about a part of my body. I don’t know yet why I’m “interested” in this thought, but it has reoccurred at different times in my life. It’s so silly, it wouldn’t make sense to you, but I’m hyperaware of the saliva in my mouth.

    I’m a successful healthcare provider, with a great marriage and four kids. I would say my life is in balance the vast majority of time and I’m very content. However, I just watched my Dad die from cancer and I have struggled with some acute anxiety (7 weeks) with panic attacks and generalized anxiety. I’m 80% better but I just can’t shake this silly obsession. I know the answer is in awareness and acceptance, but I’m too impatient to see results.

    Any specific tips or techniques I can use or do I just need to practice patience and trust that if I let go of the negativity that builds up as I try to suppress this obsession, it will eventually fade away.

    1. Sen Post author

      Casey, an obsessive thought that feels negative to you is just a symptom of an underlying imbalance, and instead of working directly on the thought it’s better to allow this imbalance to clear out first, which will automatically remove the symptom with it. You can read the below post for more insights.

      http://www.calmdownmind.com/working-on-specific-fears-vs-reducing-mind-momentum/

  3. Anu

    Dear Sen,

    Wonderful posts. I am on the journey to balance and this post resonates with my understanding.

    I want to thank you for all you are doing, but, truly, I do not have words for it. I am not using a metaphor here.

  4. abet

    sen I am confused about something in your article.

    according to the logic if one is in a negative state and becomes allowing you balance it. but what if one is in a positive state and is also being “allowing” doesn’t this create an imbalance in the light nature

    1. Sen Post author

      Abet, as I’ve mentioned in the post, the way I define ‘positive’ is a state of balance, and ‘negative’ as a state of imbalance. When you are in a state of balance you are balancing your mind and being, in other words, you are allowing the polarities of the mind/thinking and emotions. I think in your comment, you are referring to positive as a light natured thought, in which case hanging on to this thought can lead to an imbalance, and allowing is what’s needed so that you are not clinging to it – imbalance in this case is the dark nature, and allowing is the light nature that brings the required balance.

  5. Casey

    Sen,

    Do you believe in SSRI anti-depressants to help us begin to make the cognitive changes to reachieve balance? What role can responsible drug use provide?

    1. Sen Post author

      Casey, basically it’s about what feels “right” to you at any point in your life. Some people inherently understand that using drugs of any form is eventually going to make them less conscious and make them dependent in some way – if you feel this way, it’s a calling towards being free of any dependence and finding balance/healing through awareness (through the process of letting the balance to happen in a state of allowing). However, depending on your present state of mind, you need to follow your inspiration/guidance on what’s right for you, sometimes taking some drugs for a temporary relief can be the best thing for you under the circumstances. The bottom-line however is that permanent balance can only come in a conscious manner.

  6. Jenny

    Wonderful article as always Sen. Whenever I read your writings (which is everyday these days), it strikes me that I have not come across any other teacher who speaks with such candor and simplicity. The balancing of dark and light natures is a perspective that has been conspicuously absent from almost every other spiritual material I have come across, with the exception of Adyashanti. For far too long the push has always been towards eradicating the ‘dark’ and living as pure lightness, and those of us who are predominantly dark-natured have suffered enormously, struggling, as you so well put it, against the natural make-up of our minds. It is a relief to feel these writings just resonating to depths beyond words. My most heartfelt gratitude to you.

    One clarification I am seeking would be perhaps the issue of sleep and detox..my sleeping patterns lately have been deeply fatigued. I wake up and feel 100 years old and as though I ran 10 marathons in my sleep. There are nights when sleep offers no relief, like I need sleep to recover from my sleep. I’m curious – shouldn’t sleep be when the mind/body ideally recovers from all the detoxing?

    1. Starlight

      Ditto here about the sleep part. Been experiencing the same thing for the past few weeks.

    2. Sen Post author

      Jenny, this is quite normal during the phase of “release”, as the mind momentum and emotional momentum is being released. During this phase it’s best to rest as much as possible to ensure that the body does not get overly fatigued.

  7. Abdi

    sen,
    I talk too much, i over explain avlot and i repeat what i just said again and again. i always blame and judge people a lot because of their mistakes and behaves .
    I talk nonsense most of the time and the people get bored with my talking and they turn to other person and some people change the topic quickly while i am talking about the topic i see it very interesting. sometimes they don’t give attention to my speech while i am explaining something to them.
    sometimes i over-explain the things i want to explain for them .
    please and please sen tell me how to stop talking too much, repeating the same words i just said again and again, over explaining things , judging and blaming people most of the time. I hope you will help me as you help the people all the time.
    thanks

    1. Sen Post author

      Abdi, you are conscious of your “restlessness” and you understand the imbalance of it, now what’s needed is to bring a conscious balance within. It will be a journey, and it will take time, and it entails connecting with your inner space instead of being lost to the mind. “Restlessness” just means that mind has a high momentum, and when you live out this restlessness it means that you are totally anchored in the mind, where the mind feels like the master and you feel like you are its slave. You can start with a simple practice of sitting for 20 mins each day and just observing your mind like a detached observer, the way you listen to a radio – it will take time for you to have enough stability to sit and observe the mind without feeling agitated by it, the more time you spend on this practice the more stability you gain, give yourself atleast a couple of months of this practice. Once you’ve gained enough stability to observe the mind, you will notice that now you have a space in you that’s not totally lost in the mind all the time. You can proceed into the practice of “allowing”, which is to sit and allow the mind fully without identifying with it, and not buying into its noise and talk – slowly you can reach a place of total allowing. I’ve mentioned these steps in the post – Reaching a place of total allowing, and the various aspects of this journey in this post – Reducing mind momentum is the key, take the time to read them out a few times to ensure you get a clear understanding.

  8. Andrew

    Hello Sen,
    Thankyou so much for all of your writings.
    You have enabled me to stop the constant chatter and suffereing that goes on inside my mind.
    There is one thing however that keeps bothering me,
    Whenever i stay in the sate of awareness watching my thoughts i seem to either get an anxiety feeling in my solarplex, or feel emotional, like i want to cry.
    It feels as if my body is afraid of this state that is becoming more natural to me.
    Is this just a case of sticking with it and letting it resolve itself, it can be very intense at times.
    Thankyou so much

  9. Martin

    cheers from argentina! your posts have blown me away and given me hope to solve all the issues i’ve been going through for some time now. i’ve been obsessed about my physical health ever since i started having skin infections. i’ve been having jock itch for 8 months now, and no matter what treatment i get, it gets better but doesn’t go away. this makes me uncomfortable because i can’t sweat, meaning i can’t work out or practise sports. i sweat a lot too, so that makes everything even more difficult.

    it’s difficult for me not to think about it because trousers touch this area whenever i walk. i do fine when i see that the treatment is working, but as soon as i realise that it’s not, fear takes over and i become a mess.

    how can i not think or worry about something that i can feel all the time? i usually try to allow this, but after some time, it haunts me and i feel fear again.

    thanks in advance for sharing all these posts with us and for helping the ones who really need help, like me. thank you.

    1. Sen Post author

      Martin, a physical phenomenon is always an extension of thought (mind). A physical irritation is fueled by the presence of an emotional irritation, which is created by a thought rooted in irritation. It’s possible that you may not be holding these thoughts of irritation anymore (at present) but are still holding on to the energy of irritation (emotionally) instead of releasing it consciously. The emotional energy of irritation manifests physically in the body in some way depending on the genetics of the body. Basically, the physical irritation is simply a symptom, which the emotional irritation (or mental irritation) is the root cause. When you some time sitting with your body/mind, without distraction, (what I call relaxed awareness) and allow the flow of emotions and thoughts freely, you can sense if there are elements of irritation present in you – if you don’t sense it immediately, just allow continue staying in this space of awareness and you will soon start detecting these emotions/thoughts in you. Once you become aware of this energy of irritation in you, it’s about allowing it to arise in your inner space, without suppression – this allowing will cause its release. When the emotional irritation is released, the physical symptoms created by it start healing easily.

  10. Koera

    Dear sen, i just want to ask that when my body senses uneasiness or discomfort during the phase of release,there occurs some kind of physical movements.like my feet fingers start moving,and my stomach also creates some kind of movement.Is it normal?

    1. Sen Post author

      Koera, yeah that’s normal, it’s just a physiological reaction to energy movement – the muscles can contract or relax during the emotional release, and this causes involuntary movements.

  11. Williams

    Please sen, in the past, i had this proclivity to argue allot. Whenever am talking with my friend, i have this zest to express my ideas in a truculent manner.

    I have always bosted of this quality in me (owing to peoples views). But i found out recently that i no longer feel happy seeing myself argue. Now, anytime i argue, i feel like its not a right/alligned attitude (though people rate me high when i argue, due to the friends i make when am vociferouse).

    Now i want to stop it but i find it difficut to engage in any form of discusion without being truculent. Even the most subtle discussion always ends in arguement.

    is this a kind of tint/trait in me. Can it be released through the state of allowing. I used to reckon that when i allow myself to release this quality in me, i may become irrelevant in public and most of the friends i make with such attitude may start seeing me as one kind boring guy like that and may take their leave from my reality. Because thats one grave character that defines me right from childhood. What do you think i should do? I realy want your take on this.

    1. Sen Post author

      Williams, Once you start sensing that something no longer resonates with you, in your behavior, there are two possible outcomes that you can move towards

      1. You realize that this behavior is actually aligned with you (with your personality), and the fact that it doesn’t resonate with you could be because of some “hangups” that you’ve developed, and you look to drop those hangups and be more aligned with your personality

      2. You realize that this behavior just feels “off” to your current awareness, and you feel a strong movement towards a certain growth in your behavior where you let go of this behavior-trait in you as a conscious choice. (Certain traits of our behavior are bound to change as a part of growth, and when these traits do change you will notice some past elements of your reality (that were attracted by those traits) falling away quite inevitably)

      Of course, it can also be a combination of the above points, where you just need to “balance out” this aspect of your behavior instead of dropping it completely. You need to spend some time, with yourself, allowing yourself to get a sense of what it is that feels “off” to you, and why does it feel “off” – for example, it’s possible that you feel that this aspect of “arguing” feels like a drain of energy because you seem to be rooted in “I need to win this argument” mindset, rather than having an open-minded discussion. Also, it’s possible that your “vociferous” behavior no longer resonates with your current awareness, and it might look a bit childish to you now. If these are the reasons, then you can look at letting go of the “need” to win an argument, along with the behavior of getting truculent (cutting down people with your tonality and imposition), while still incorporating this attitude of wanting to indulge in discussions (may be that’s aligned with the critical thinking aspect of your mind, and there’s nothing wrong with that). It could also be that you just desire a break from your “extroversion”, and what to spend some time connecting with the aspect of “inner silence” as a part of the growth in your awareness.

      It’s important to be aligned with yourself, to be clear about knowing why you do what you do, and if some things that you are doing are no longer really relevant to your current growth – and it’s very possible to know these answers if you simply spend time with yourself in an open state of introspection. You can’t make your behavior about “what works to impress other people”, that would just be a dance monkey dance kinda behavior where you are out to entertain people in a hope to keep them around you and you stop being true to yourself (or the self that you’ve grown towards). It’s better to be alone than to be around people with whom you need to put up a front/mask that’s not really you, unless you consciously chose to enjoy wearing a mask – let go of thinking about what people expect of you, and spend time introspecting about what feels aligned with you in your current awareness.

    2. Mark

      I have the same tendency with you Williams. And, it’s not enjoyable, always arguing with someone, especially someone who we love. Actually, my partner have been pointing out this matter, but I always overlooked it in the past. Lately it becomes so obvious to my awareness. And I thank you for both you and Sen for the clarity.

  12. Williams

    Thanks sen. I appreciate it.

  13. koera

    hi sen,
    i don’t know why i am having so much confusion theses days.My opinions regarding people keeps on changing as a result the way i treat them also changes.The person which i consider to be good and trustworthy becomes bad and untrustworthy another day. My perception regarding people keeps on changing so frequently that some day i talk and treat nicely and some day i ignore and show cold behavior to the same person. please sen give me advice regarding how should i behave with people

Comments are closed.