Dissolving the Resistance of Ego

Posted on by Sen.



Ego is a thought-structure based in separation where the brain takes itself to be “me” and looks at the world as the “other”. The brain does need a sense of “me” in order to function, and it serves a practical value in physical life. However, once this sense of “me” becomes acutely rigid and strong, it can become a huge source of resistance to the movement of life. A “positive me” or a “negative me” are both equally dysfunctional when awareness is totally lost in this identity. The “positive me” has as much capacity to do harm in the form of a sense of superiority which can take the expression of arrogance, snobbishness, depravity, insensitivity, negative selfishness (tendency to exploit others), narcissism and shallowness. The “negative me” obviously is toxic in its expressions of self-pity, self-hatred, neediness, over-sensitivity, victim mindset, incompetence and meekness. The “me” structure gains force, and solidity, through the constant attention that is showered to it due to unconscious identification (when you are lost in thinking of yourself as purely the “me” or ego).

The ego can never feel whole, its very foundation is based in the thought of separation, and hence it’s always disconnected with life in someway. The stronger the force of ego, the more acute the disconnection. However, the ego has a practical purpose in physical living, and its presence is inevitable in the brain, and as long as the ego is “light” there is never a problem because it does not stand in resistance to life’s movement. I like to use the word “transparent” – when the ego becomes transparent it’s no longer a problem, but when its rock solid, and dense, it’s a huge source of resistance (which obviously results in suffering). Close to 99% of your suffering is induced by the resistance of ego to the movement of life-stream. The other 1% is purely normal/natural resistance which is present in a physical body, which is required to stay physical.

A strong ego is bound to suffer

When the ego becomes “light”, and transparent, I call it the “positive ego” because now it’s no longer a source of resistance but stays true to its practical value of giving a meaningful expression to your physical experience. Some people naturally have a light ego, but it’s quite rare. In most cases one needs to awaken out of identification with ego, go through a phase of “letting go” of this identification, allowing the force/intensity of the ego’s resistance to dissolve, so that it finally becomes light and transparent. When the ego becomes light, you become free of resistance on a permanent basis – you just become a resistance-free being. In this place, you function purely from the connection with your life-stream, allowing your natural expression and experiencing life from a place of inner wholeness.

When you awaken, and start observing the ego movement in the mind, it soon becomes clear to you that the ego is never going to be happy, not for long. It has temporary moments of satiation, but it gets back to its rabid restlessness in a bid to keep adding something to it structure, it’s constantly hungry for approval, attention, entertainment, possession and “the future”, and hence is never at peace with itself. The paradox is that the ego wants to feel whole, and it’s the ego that’s the source of the feeling of incompleteness (due to resistance), and hence it’s a catch 22 situation. To feel whole the ego needs to thin out, but the ego wants to stand its ground chasing wholeness from the outside, never really finding it.

The ego always has a delusion that something/someone in the future will make it whole, it’s quite a tragic movement because this is a perfect setup for a life of constant disappointment and restlessness. Moreover, the ego is so lost in its focus on its “petty” personal issues that it lives a highly shallow and surface-level experience without any real connection with the wholeness, or depth, of life. It’s the force of ego that attaches itself to all kinds of fears, amplifying it and adding them to its identity (along with the various labels). In the absence of the force/momentum of ego, it’s impossible to have obsessive thoughts because the brain on its own does not have the power to generate obsession – it requires the anchor of ego to fuel or obsess a thought. If there was no ego intrusion, the brain would sync up with your life-stream quite easily and hence will have a harmonious movement.

Addiction to the ego is difficult to let go

When you’ve been addicted to the ego for so many years, to actually allow it to dissolve in force causes some severe withdrawal symptoms for a while. However, you would need to choose between the temporary unpleasantness of withdrawal from the ego over the constant suffering of identification with it. As long as the ego has a strong hold it’s not possible to be resistance-free, because the ego can easily create conflict with the movement of your life-stream. The ego structure contains a lot of external conditioning, limiting beliefs, false perceptions, separatist ideas and shallow outlook, which constantly stands in resistance to the movement of your life-stream, which is always rooted in wholeness and totality, causing a conflict between your physical and non-physical natures.

If you watch the ego structure of your brain, or watch the ego in others, it becomes very obvious how incredibly shallow it is in its outlook. Such a shallowness totally contradicts your true nature of wholeness. It’s an evidence of the strong force that ego has accumulated that most people cannot even sense that they are being shallow – they feel totally justified, and okay, in being shallow. The ego’s desires (which are mostly just “lack based” thoughts) can be deeply in conflict with your natural expression, because the “ego” is not actually you, to a large extent it’s a creation of external conditioning of the outside. It’s also very difficult to distinguish if a desire is coming from the egoic perspective or from your natural expression, because they both feel like a desire – though the former is mostly just a lack-based thought, while the latter is a natural outflow. The only way to come to a clarity is by allowing the force of ego to dissolve, so that what remains is purely your true, natural, expression.

Physical life by itself is a great aid in helping in deconstructing the force of ego, because the ego thrives on attachment whereas physical life is a constant flux of change/dissolution which creates a sense of loss in the ego. When the ego faces a real loss, or a perception of a loss, its starts breaking down, however most of us don’t allow it to become transparent by allowing this deconstruction – we constantly keep trying to “repair” it up out of a fear that we would be lost without the force of ego. Fear is also a transformative “fire” that has the capacity to burn down the rigid grip of ego, that’s why I always give the pointer of “allow the fear fully” because when you do so you always break-down the force of your ego (which always wants to escape fear).

Different pointers are required at different phases

The very pointer of “let go” is for you to stop fueling the ego (which is at the root of all negativity) and just allow it to ebb away in force. Of course, it’s not as easy as it sounds because the ego has the tendency to use this pointer as a technique and create a new identity out of it, which leads to another form of negativity where you are trying to deny yourself through suppression. This is the reason why a lot of spiritual people get stuck/suppressed in seeking to get “rid” of the ego, because they lack a deeper understanding of physical life. So it’s required to give different pointers, and understandings, to keep the ego from becoming stuck on one pointer (thus making a technique out of it). In the end it’s not some technique that takes you to freedom, it’s a deeper and clear understanding that does.

It’s not easy to just let go without any understanding of what’s being let go of, and it also requires a stability in your awareness before you can even be conscious of the dysfunctions of the strong force of ego in you. Hence different pointers are required, for different people, depending on the phase they are in. Moreover, the ego has the tendency to take any pointer and make it into a technique (creating a new identify of sorts), and hence another pointer is required to break free from the unconscious identification with the previous pointer. Eventually, anyone who starts becoming aware comes to a point where they see through the dysfunction of their ego structure – it usually happens when they’ve exhausted all the techniques, strategies or in the face of a “loss”.

Eventually, when the force of ego dissolves you realize that all the pointers were only required to dissolve the resistances created by the ego. Note that it’s not the ego structure of the brain that needs to dissolve, only its “force”, or momentum, needs to dissolve. The ego is not a problem (and serves an inherent value in physicality) where it’s light and non-intrusive towards the movement of your life-stream. The way to dissolve the force of ego is to see through it completely, so that you are no longer deluded by its pull – once this happens you automatically start letting go of it.




18 Comments

  1. Joy

    is it me that in your blog i am founding all pieces of deep understanding i was missing, or this sharing place of you is totally bliss itself – simple, clearly told truth? Anyway I cant be more greatful. Thank You:)

  2. Kenshin

    Dear sen

    I have been practicing relax awareness for awhile and now my body feels really weird. Usually, those fast heart beat/tension happens only when I practice relax awareness. Now, I feel like these fast heart beat/tension happens all the time but my awareness is clear as usually. I am just wondering what is going on with me.

    Kenshin

    1. Sen Post author

      Kenshin, it’s just the body adapting to the higher vibration as the suppressed energy within you is finding a release as you getting more relaxed and open. I am guessing you’ve lived a life of deep suppression, which has a caused a strong movement of resistance in your mind and a lot suppressed energy in your body. As you are letting go through the practice of relaxed awareness, the body is coming back to its natural high vibration state of harmony. The body settles down into a harmony soon enough as it comes to a stability in its natural vibration, as the momentum of suppress energy ebbs away.

    2. Kenshin

      In one of your previous post, you mentioned something about “when one is midway in this phase the rest of the journey is just inevitable”. How do you define midway in phase 3?

    3. Sen Post author

      Kenshin, you just know when you are aligned with the pull of your life to the extent where your mind’s fear-based conditioning is not able to pull you into incongruent actions. Usually when you let go of being pulled by the mind’s fear based movement to about 50%, you start feeling the pull of your life-stream very strongly after which its not possible for you to get dragged by the mind’s negative momentum anymore.

    4. Kenshin

      Dear sen

      Is there anyway I can help other close to me to see the truth? Because whenever I present any material, they simply reject it right away. I am aware enough to help myself. Thanks.

      Kenshin

    5. Sen Post author

      Kenshin, you cannot force someone to understand something they are not willing or ready for. Different people have different levels of awareness, and their perception is limited to that. You can follow your inspiration to teach/guide if that’s your inspiration, but don’t expect others to accept what you are saying, let them find their own resonance. Sometimes the ego can come into the front and feels bad if someone rejects when you are trying to guide them, it’s an indication of the force of ego in you and you will need to let it go further.

  3. Luka

    Hey Sen,

    Are you ever going to write a book?

    1. Sen Post author

      When there is an inspiration for it in me, it will certainly come about.

  4. Sunrise

    Joy, I share with you your post. I have been on a quest to “finding” wholeness, true joy and peace for a very long time but always found myself not being able to quite get there. I had major fears that wouldn’t disolve due to the relationship I practiced with the mind. For a long time I felt like i was seing the end of the tunel but for some reason coukdn’t get to it. Finding this blog for me was the begining of my awakening. All the missing links were found. I can’t explain with words how this experince is being for me. Sometimes my mind tries to question why this is happening now or how or who is he, etc but the being in me knows this blessing is part of the life energy we all are part of.

  5. Eternus

    Sen,

    Since the shift I felt a few days ago, it wasn’t quite as strong, until I felt quite intense presence last night. All through today, I felt a distinct sense of peace, like a calmness that came from outside of myself (although obviously it must have come from inside), it was kind of humming along in the background, even though my general mood was very low. I also have this feeling of hope, like something inside telling me “everything will be good”. I’m assuming this is all part of the transformation process, and I’m not just imagining this?

    Thanks

    1. Sen Post author

      Eternus, none of this is your imagination but a natural unfolding of this transition where the hold of your ego is becoming more transparent allowing your inner being (your life-stream) to connect with your brain. The message of “everything will be good” comes from your inner being that’s starting to come to the fore-ground as the ego is dissolving in force.

  6. Sue

    I love what you say about the Ego’s hunger for approval. It has been mine understanding that the ego is the survivalist animalistic hence fear based attribute of the mind, it represents the physical body’s need to survive. When the body and mind are in alinement the ego pisses off ,for the most part. Excuse my frankness, I couldn’t think of a better way to describe it.

  7. Justine

    Hi Sen

    Could it be possible for a persons ego to strengthen and malfunction being involved with a man with severe nacissistic personality disorder ? What i mean is the longer the relationship continues the more your ego becomes like theirs.

    1. Sen Post author

      Justine, it’s possible for this to happen if the person involved is totally “unconscious”, with a very low self-awareness, or inner connection – someone who is totally lost to the outside, and influence by the outside, without any sense of inner guidance/connection. Anyone who has an iota awareness would be able to have a sense of wisdom and not take on the negativity of another person.

  8. Justine

    Hi Sen ,

    Many thanks, this is a really interesting post.. you said that when the ego force starts to dissolve after many years of being addicted to it a person would experience unpleasant withdrawal symptoms.. what kind of symptoms is one likely to experience ? Also, would it mean that each time a person has bouts of these symptoms, the ego force is being reduced or weakened more everytime ?

    1. Sen Post author

      Justine, by ego force I just mean “mind momentum”, it’s just a different way of describing the negativity of being a prisoner to the mind. You can read the post Reducing the mind momentum for insights on your queries.

  9. Brandon

    Sen how do I differentiate between not having the desire to work a 9-5 but to indulge in more creative pursuits (modeling for ex) and the lack of drive to get up every morning and go to a 9-5 job?

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