How to Deal With Feelings of Uncertainty?
One of the reasons why the mind fears is because it does not know what lies ahead, because your future is always a mystery, you can’t ever know your future with any certainty. Why is the future uncertain? Because life is always the Now, even life does not know how the future will unfold, it […]
Link back to full article: https://www.calmdownmind.com/dealing-with-uncertainty/
Sen,
Thanks again for sharing your wisdom and I need your guidance. It’s a long story but I’ll try to be brief and give the most important information. I left my father’s business 2 years ago due to having conflicts with him and since, I’ve realize there are very few outside employment prospects for me due to age, years away from my previous profession, etc. It’s been a source of great stress for me for a long time. Some spiritual teachings and now especially your teachings are helping me see that I need to reach a state of total allowing and just trust life… and a solution to my life’s challenge will come. And I accept that this whole episode is necessary for my growth and just part of our life experience.
But right now, I’m pressed by my wife who has patiently stood by me despite our difficulties, but now have decided that it would be best if we went back to her home country where she can do much more to help our family financially (she cannot work where we live now). I’m against this due to the impact it will have on moving the kids and their schooling, on my elderly mother who relies on me, and yes, for myself where I feel I still have the most opportunity here as opposed to moving to her country.
Following your teachings, I’m allowing all the negative thoughts and emotions to arise and let them be… but I still need to come to a decision. By allowing, do I just give in to her and trust life that it’ll all for the best? It’s difficult because of the fears I have not just for myself but how it would affect those near me. What if I feel like she’s come to this decision partly due to her own ego (self-interest), yes, out of worry for the family’s future but also wanting to be in control, self-esteem issues, etc. Do I just accept that it’s my ego that’s saying those things so should be ignored while her ego-based decision is just fine for use to follow? I’m not getting much internal wisdom, do I just meekly surrender and not even try to stand up for myself and those others that will be affected by this decision because I’m supposed to be all-allowing? Thank you for your time and kindness.
Kin, maybe your wife suggesting moving to her country is the solution life offers you?
Thanks Marcus, for the encouragement.
I’m coming around… I think. Just telling myself no matter what happens, I’m gonna be fine! Trust that that’s what life has intended for me. A big part of me have always believed in destiny and I’ve gone through more then a few big challenges in my adult life and somehow, life has always found me the best solutions each time beyond my expectations. Sen’s contraction and expansion, I guess. I just need to trust that life will deliver for me again this time (when it’s ready).
Sen says expect to go through a lot of turmoil in phase 3, so maybe what this is. I was even able to smile to myself and thank life for giving me these challenges (well, very briefly, but it was an honest feeling), that’s amazing progress from where I’ve come from. I know I still got a long ways to go…
Dear Sen,
I am Merve. I’m writing from Istanbul. I came upon your article as I was trying to find “instant relief” for the fear of uncertainty. I have experienced this several times in my life and I said to myself “I need to get out of this vicious circle.” Reading your article has absolutely freshened up my dismal day, especially your emphasis on “fully allowing fear” in order to overcome it. This is absolutely very enlightening, lightening because it is the exact opposite of what many of us do. I was saying to myself and actually writing a letter to a friend back in January: “I fear that I will fear tomorrow.” I was doing the exact opposite: Avoiding fear by fearing it! But now I will feel more expansive, receptive and welcoming. After all, fear is, as you very well put it, one of our survival mechanisms and we should not fight against it. We should believe in its transformative power, allow it to come, stay with us and show us guidance. Life is absolutely an orchard if we internalize these simple truths about our existence!
Thank you, thank you so much.
We never know, in our cyber modern day, hope and healing will come from.
Best,
Merve