One of the most significant growth that a being goes through is the growth towards finding a conscious balance, what I also call coming to a place of inner wholeness. This “balance” is about integrating the light and dark nature (yin/yang) component in your being; this integration brings you to a place of inner wholeness, which automatically translates into an external wholeness in your personal reality. Coming to inner wholeness is a journey of growth, and in many cases, this journey is instigated by a “wake-up call”. The wake-up call is usually in the form of some unrelenting fear or emotional suffering. The very reason one ends up in a place where a wake-up call is needed is because of being unconsciously imbalanced (either towards their light nature or dark nature) in some way; in fact, as soon as you start becoming imbalanced the wake-up calls start making their presence known in your reality (like alarm bells) but it’s just that most of us don’t heed to them until they become really loud.
When the wake-up call starts sounding, the usual reaction is to try and suppress it – the way we keep hitting the snooze option on our digital alarm clock, to continue sleeping. You can, of course, suppress your wake-up call in many ways, it’s just that your imbalance keeps aggravating as you fail to heed to these wake-up calls, until you reach a point where you can no longer avoid its blaring presence. A wake-up call is simply an indication that a “growth” is needed towards inner balance. In this blog, the significant focus is on the journey towards inner wholeness, and the wake-up call towards making this journey comes through when you become deluded through certain unconscious thinking patterns, leading to an imbalance in your state of being – the more you live in these patterns of delusion, the more imbalance you accumulate, and the stronger your wake-up calls become.
(There are also calls, towards growth in your expression, that happen even after you reach inner wholeness; it’s just that the calls are felt as “inspiration” rather than coming in the form of an imbalanced/negative situation. Growth is never ending and you constantly feel inspired to re-invent yourself in some way, eternally, by your very nature. Being stagnant is not an option in the life-energy that you are)
Identifying a wake-up call
Some very common wake-up calls that a human being experiences, as an indication towards finding inner balance, are as below
– An anxiety that seems to be unrelenting in its presence. The anxiety, as an emotion, may feel “unreasonable” (having no particular reason), or it could be instigated by some event/situation in your life.
– Obsessive fear/fears created by thoughts. Some fears seem to come up out of the blue, created by some random thought that you start obsessing about. Some fears may get created by a certain interpretation that you make, about a situation, which in turn become a form of obsessive pattern in your mind.
– An event in your life (including some bodily condition like a disease) that leaves you feeling emotionally broken, lost, confused or powerless
– A nagging feeling of being stuck
– An uncontrolled behavior/response-pattern that starts creating a dysfunction in your reality
– A strong desire, for a certain manifestation, that causes you to be restless, or be in a state of restless craving
In a nut shell, any form of suffering is a wake-up call towards growth. The above forms of suffering are common indicators of a required growth towards finding an inner balance, or connecting with your inner wholeness.
Responding to a wake-up call
The unconscious response towards a wake-up call is to try and suppress it in some way through “numbing” yourself – you can do that through keeping yourself occupied in some external distraction, thus avoiding facing the uneasiness within. Other unconscious responses include the below
– Blaming the circumstances/people for your condition, and using this blame as a shield to keep yourself from facing your inner imbalance that’s attracting this situation
– Blaming yourself, thus entering into a cycle of self-hatred, self-pity, guilt and regret
– Looking for quick fixes on the outside, like drugs, alcohol, “unconscious” spirituality (what’s also called spiritual entertainment, where you try to detach yourself, or numb yourself, through finding an escape through a technique or spiritual pre-occupation), relationships, activities, used as a means of staying in a trance of pre-occupation.
– Taking some extreme steps like ending your physical life through suicide
The conscious response is to understand that it’s just a call for letting go of certain unconscious patterns of living, and thus understand that it’s simply a growth call for you as a being. The situations that are part of the wake-up call will dissolve easily the moment you respond to the growth that’s required of you. Don’t worry so much about the situation, rather just look at what the situation is pointing out within you – your patterns of thinking, your emotional accumulation/momentum, your understanding of life and your mind momentum, are at the root of any imbalance, and the wake-up call is simply an indication of this imbalance.
“Inner work” is what is required to bring forth the required growth. A lot of people tend to focus too much on trying to change their external actions (through force) instead of first working on bringing their inner space to order. The simple truth is that the external will take care of itself if you get your inner space in alignment. A wake-up call can come as an external event, but it’s reflecting an inner imbalance in you. So, instead of fighting the external situation, start looking within to observe the inner patterns of negativity/imbalance that’s attracting this wake-up call.
Below are the steps involved in bringing developing the ability for a conscious response
– Find some space to be with yourself where you are not distracted by the outside (if you can find this space for 20-30 mins a day, it should be good enough)
– Use this space to first allow your focus/attention to relax its hold on the mind and emotions. I call this entering a state of relaxed awareness. It can take some time (may be a few weeks) before you get good at being in a state of relaxed awareness
– From a place of relaxed awareness, just sense the agitation in your mind or in your emotions (in your body) without getting hooked on it. The point of relaxed awareness is to ensure that you stay more like an “open space” rather being hooked/narrowed down on a thought or emotion. You don’t have to watch thoughts in a rigid manner, just allow yourself awareness to be relaxed and observe the movement of your mind/emotions from this place – there is an automatic observation, you don’t have to force yourself to observe.
– Observe patterns of thoughts running in your mind, observe emotions (like fear) coursing through your body, observe your mind’s pull, observe your need to control the mind, observe your fear towards the mind, observe the questions and doubts in your being (and your mind), observe the need for assurance, observe your discomfort towards the presence of intense emotions in your body (and your need to suppress them). Just allow the presence of all of this, and continue being an open space of awareness.
– Spend a few weeks just deepening in your ability to stay as a space of relaxed awareness. This ability is crucial towards bringing any dissolution to a pattern of imbalance/negativity. When your awareness is narrowed down on the thoughts/emotions there is no space for “response”, there is only “reaction”. The more relaxed, and spacious, your awareness is the more you ability to respond from a place of wisdom.
– Develop the ability to reach a place of total allowing, where you don’t feel the need to resist or suppress the mind, or emotions, and your awareness is open enough to allow their free movement. (You can read this post – Reaching a place of total allowing for more insight). The state of total allowing is all that’s needed to come to a place of inner balance, there are two reasons for this 1. It opens you up to connect with the intelligence of your life-stream (or your inner being, life-space, non-physical intelligence, spirit guides or whatever label you want to use) 2. It allows a release of accumulated mind/emotional momentum.
A state of total allowing is not a “passive” state, in fact it requires a lot of stability in your awareness to reach this state – it takes time, and it happens over a few months of deepening in your space of relaxed awareness. It also requires “understanding”, whereby you can let go of some resistances that you may be holding on to due to some deluded/misguided thought patterns, for example, due to lack of understanding, it’s possible for people to keep resisting dark nature aspects from arising freely in them (like resisting states of sadness, grief, sexuality, anger, fear etc) and thus prevent the movement towards inner balance. Of course, the necessary understanding/guidance starts coming to you as you just connect more with the space of total allowing – in that sense, the state of allowing becomes a channel through which intelligence can flow into your life and bring forth guidance, inspiration, understanding, as well as aligned actions, that eventually orchestrate the dissolution of the situation that acted as the wake-up call, plus they bring forth the creation of a reality that’s aligned with this inner growth.