The reason why an unconscious mind craves a defined “structure” is because it’s afraid of being open to the depth of life. Following a conventional, society-defined, structure gives it a false sense of security, status, and even self-worth, which allows it to feel that it has “fitted in” and thus it keeps trying to hold on to it. A lot of people blindly buy into the structure meted out by the society as the way to live their life and feel inadequate if they somehow don’t fit in to it, never allowing themselves to think independently – this is what unconscious living is all about. When you unconsciously follow a structure, you become dead to your own inner guidance.
The more awareness you develop about life, the more available you are to see beyond the narrow perspectives fed to you by the society you were brought up in. How many people judge themselves negatively for not being able to retain a conventional 9 to 5 job? It’s such a narrow way of looking at yourself. When you broaden your perspective you may realize that, may be, doing a strident job is not your calling at all, may be you are born to indulge in more creative pursuits. It requires some amount of courage to be willing to be free of the rigid structures placed on your mind by the conventional society conditioning – it’s important to understand that most societies have been deeply unconscious for so many years, and subscribing to its structures blindly is like accepting an unconscious way of living. Stop living for societal approval and let go of trying to fit in, so that you can start living in alignment with your own calling.
Looking outside the lens of narrow conditioning
When “awareness” starts growing in your physical being, you have the choice to see beyond narrow conditioning. Life is far more than just living out a society defined structure, it’s has far greater depth which you can experience if you can just stop wearing the blinkers put on your eyes by the rigid conditioning. What you might imagine as your desires may easily be just some conditioned thoughts fed to you by the society, in which case it’s not really your desire rather it’s what you think you should desire. Like a person who keeps forcing himself to “desire” a 9 to 5 job, when in his heart he has no real inclination to do a 9 to 5 job, and the only reason he’s intending it is because all his friends have a 9 to 5 job. The society also trains you to look at everything from the perspective of how much money you can make rather than how compatible you are with that vocation or job – you see youngsters taking up college courses less for their interest/inclination and more out of the capacity it has to buy them a future status or some “narrow” life-style.
You can’t even know what your true calling is until you are first willing to step out of looking from narrow conditioning of the society. It’s possible that your deal is to be in a 9 to 5 job, but be fearless enough to find out if that’s really the case by delving into your heart instead on living on surface of your mind. Another example of unconscious subjugation would be a girl who imagines that she needs to marry a guy who her parents/relatives approve of, or who seems to “fit in” with the societal model (prestigious job and status et al), rather than marrying a guy who she finds compatibility with. It’s a huge indication of mis-alignment within, when our decisions are based more on impressing others, and finding societal acceptance, rather than following our heart.
If you are always trying to place it safe, by never thinking independently but living to “fit in” with others, it won’t be long before you end up in a rut of living a dead life where it feels as if you are living more as a machine than an alive being. Be willing to step out of just thinking from your narrow conditioning and look at life with your heart – it’s not just about eating great food, traveling to cool places, getting laid or bagging a promotion, though all of these are some means of enjoying physicality. You need to let your awareness go deeper than just these surface-level aspects of physicality, or else you end up becoming a very shallow person who has no real depth in his/her outlook towards life. As a grown up you have the capacity to be more aware of the depth of life instead of having the same mindset as a teenager who is hung up about losing his/her virginity.
Aligning with the totality of life
You are not just an individual existence, you are connected to the whole. The more you try to separate yourself from the whole, the more narrow/shallow you become in your perception of life. You can start first by letting go of attaching yourself to strident identities of your culture, country or family, and see yourself more as a child of this universe. The intention in life-stream that created the circumstances for the birth of your body is connected to the totality, and hence you can only truly realize your own inner calling when you see yourself from the perspective of totality rather than seeing yourself from some narrow identities or stories of your mind.
The question is if you are willing to connect yourself with the movement of your life-stream that’s connected with totality, and hence is far higher than just your individual vision (which automatically get taken care of once you stop focusing on the trivialities of it). As long as your focus is primarily on your personal problems defined by your mind’s narrow vision – like stressing over a relationship, anxiety about a job (which you don’t even like), worrying about money, feeling jealous about your neighbor etc – it just makes you see life in a totally narrow perspective. But the moment you are willing to surrender yourself to your life-stream, your personal problems are soon taken care of (mostly because you are no longer fueling them with your attention) and you seem to become more connected with a wholistic movement (a movement in totality) rather than just an individual movement.
Becoming conscious is an invitation to have a broader vision
If you are becoming “conscious” it’s basically a call to start letting go of your narrow pre-occupation with some conditioned way of thinking and start merging with the wholistic movement of your life-stream, aligning with your true calling, which is always in sync with totality – it’s not an individual movement but a movement in sync with the well-being of the collective. Of course, your personal life automatically gets well taken care of when you are aligned with the calling of your life-stream.
When you are highly “unconscious”, or when you have a low level of awareness, it’s normal to be totally lost in a narrow way of living, usually defining food, shopping, status and sex as the end all and be all of life. But as you become more aware, you start seeing beyond a surface-level way of living, and start integrating yourself with the guidance of your life-stream, in one sense it almost becomes “impersonal” because you realize that this is a movement of totality rather than just an individual movement, you sense a connection with the whole rather than just being focused on some narrow “conditioned” mind-created personal issues.
The reason why so many people are lost in their personal problems, and self-esteem issues, is because they are not willing to see beyond it towards their universal connection. They are so acutely focused on their own self-absorbing problems that they keep attracting the same narrow issues over and over again making a life out of it. This is one way of living life, but it’s a very limited way of living and it disconnects you from experiencing life in a far deeper and wholistic way, and it prevents your wholistic expression. The desires your mind has in this place are usually very narrow and mostly just a lackful way of thinking – like trying to show off to your neighbor (so basically they are not really desires but a part of negative thinking).
Realize that you are a creation of universal intent, you are far more than just an individual existence, you are connected to the whole and your purpose (the intent of your creation) is also connected to the whole. Allow yourself to see beyond your petty personal issues, no matter how big they seem to your mind in its narrow+conditioned vision, and start connecting more with your inner calling. Open up to allowing yourself to be moved by life, surrender yourself to your life-stream, and you will see how your narrow personal issues/fears are erased quite easily and your expression becomes in tune with your true calling. The broader desires, or thoughts of creation, you have in this place of connection have a sense of wholeness to them, which seems to be coming more from totality than just an individual perspective.