The difference between a person who stays a prisoner to the negative momentum in the mind, and a person who moves towards freedom from it, lies in the attitude – the former is always buying into the negativity of the mind, while the latter is never defending negativity at any moment. Attitude is a matter of choice and you can change your attitude towards negativity at any point, no matter what your circumstances, no matter what your genetics, no matter what your perceived limitations. People who defend negativity cannot be free of it, it just doesn’t work that way – you can’t defend negativity and move towards freedom from it at the same time.
You have to make choice – are you willing to commit to the process of freedom from the negative momentum in the mind or would you rather sit doubting the possibility of freedom? Without this commitment you will find it really difficult to ride through the phase of allowing the negative momentum in your mind to ebb away, and allowing the release of the suppressed negative energy of the past, the detox phase as I call it.
The attitude of defending negativity
I can’t emphasize how important it is to have this commitment towards not defending negativity at any cost. If you defend negativity you are directly fueling its presence in your mind. See if you can find any of these patterns of thought in you, which reflect that you may be defending the negativity in your mind.
- Something negative happened in the past and you keep using it as an identity by fixating on it. May be you went through abuse or had a dysfunctional upbringing, and your mind has created a negative ego identity, which you keep refueling by focusing on it.
- You keep thinking that other people have it better than you, that life has been unfair to you. You hold a bitterness towards life in general.
- You find ways to prove that it’s not possible for you to be free of the pull of your mind’s negativity. You prefer joining forums where you can discuss how difficult it is to be free of negativity.
- You keep associating with some labels of mental illness or disorder and hence you keep looking at yourself as an ill person. It’s ridiculous to see how freely labels of mental illnesses are being given to completely normal people (who may just have some momentum of negativity in their mind), mostly to get them hooked on medications and a lifetime of therapy. A lot of therapists have no qualms in giving out labels of mental illness, even to young kids, to win patients. These labels become “lifetime identities” for many people..
- You are always focused on a mindset of struggle and effort, rather than be aligned with inspired or joyful action. You make a struggle out of everything.
- You are constantly looking for evidence to prove that nothing is going right
- You always want people to see you as a someone who needs support rather than see you as someone who is independent and self-sustained
- You don’t trust life, you would rather trust your mind’s fears
These are just some very common behaviors inherent to people who are unconsciously defending their negativity.
There is no cure for a negative attitude
Life is always moving towards growth, it’s always a forward movement. If you are holding on to a negative attitude, you are not in alignment with your life-stream’s movement towards growth – suffering cannot be helped when one has this attitude of holding on to the past patterns of resistance/negativity, and defending them. It’s doesn’t matter where you are born, what you are born as or what your circumstances are, it’s just an initial platform from which growth can start. Life is unending growth, there is no final destination, this journey is about constant growth and the journey is all there is – you can either be aligned with this journey and thus have a smooth experience, or you can be constantly rooted in resistance and have a miserable experience. Life wants to take different expressions so that it can explore it’s own potential to grow through different circumstances – whatever be your challenge at the moment, it’s a platform for growth.
It’s naïve if you think that there are some people who have no challenges or that they have been endowed with better resources to handle their challenges – everyone has challenges at every point in their life, and their challenges are aligned with their unique capacity, don’t compare your challenges with that of others, don’t think that someone has it easier than you – always remember that life is an endless journey of growth, no-one has it “done”, and we all have our individual journey as streams of consciousness, it has been going on for several lifetimes and will continue going on eternally. If you are asking what’s the point of growth if there is no destination to reach? Well, there are destinations that you reach at every phase, but the growth continues to the next level from that phase, and thus it goes on eternally – the point of this journey is that life enjoys this expression of movement, nothing more nothing less.
One of my favorite movies is “Scent of a Woman” Starring Al Pacino, where he is a blind Lieutenant Colonel retired from the army, there is a memorable scene in this movie where he delivers a resounding speech in front of a gathering of students, and he says this – “There was a time I could see, and I have seen, boys like these, younger than these, their arms torn out, their legs ripped off. But there is nothing like the sight of an amputated spirit, there is no prosthetic for that”. What he calls “amputated spirit” is basically what the spirit of negative attitude is, and there is no cure for that – no matter what you learn, no matter how many therapists you visit, no matter how many meditations you indulge in, no matter how many insights you get, nothing will ever make any difference if you have a negative attitude. There really is no cure for a negative attitude, because it can’t allow any cure to come in.
It doesn’t matter what your attitude was in the past, you have the choice to make a change right now. Nothing is stopping you from changing your attitude, not your past, not your genetics, not your circumstances, not the people around you – it’s a choice you can consciously make at any point when you are willing to. You can’t ever hope to be free of negativity if your attitude is one of defending it, no matter what your excuse may be. If you are aware of negativity in you, that means you have a choice to stay identified with it or to let go of fueling it. The negativity, of course, has a past momentum, and it won’t vanish in a day, but your attitude of not defending it will ensure that you no longer give fuel to it and hence it will die away from your inner space soon enough.