Each of us is at a certain level of awareness and the outlook/preferences we have at any particular point in our life is determined not only by our external conditioning, and natural make-up of our brain, but also by the level of awareness that’s present in us. As the level of awareness keeps increasing in a human, it also transforms his/her outlook on life – the desires that felt really important at one point suddenly lose importance, the opinions and point-of-views that felt so true suddenly lose validity, the goals and aspirations that seemed vital suddenly seem to lose their grip. In fact, this awareness has the capacity to transform your personality altogether and completely shift your perspectives on life.
A lot of people going through this inner transformation, owing to the deepening of awareness in them, may feel “disoriented” because this process involves a disconnection from their old way of being, from their old preferences, outlooks, desires, perspectives and personality. This feeling of “disorientation” can create a sense of aloneness, confusion and anxiety, when one does not realize what’s really going on. People who are going through this inner transformation and are experiencing a sense of disorientation need to realize that there is nothing “negative” happening, and what’s really happening is a “positive maturity” which will allow you to experience life in a more wholesome and connected way.
Have you seen through the play of physicality?
It’s very common, when the level awareness becomes very strong, to see through the whole “play” of physicality and realize a deeper “meaninglessness” in all of it (not in a negative way but as a clear observation). You suddenly see in a very lucid way that all experiences are fleeting, that all realities dissolve at some point, and that there is a limit to the gamut of our sensations, our feelings, our emotions and our sensory perceptions. A sense of “been there done that” is what becomes apparent in your awareness and suddenly nothing really seems to have any real pull over you, no desire feels important enough, no experience seems enticing enough and no activity seems alluring enough. If you’ve not reached this place in your awareness, it might seem like a “negative” or depressed place to be, but I assure you it’s not. And anyone who has sensed this place will know that it’s not a depressing place but one of a deep “relief”, with a sense of freedom and peaceful joy.
I call this place “effortless existence” because whoever gets to this level of awareness usually becomes totally effortless in their movement. There is a sense of “free energy” in such humans, their energy is no longer pulling or pushing against anything, but is in a totally relaxed state of being. A spiritual teacher called Nisargadatta Maharaj used the following words to describe this place of being – “I allow my physical being to fulfill its destiny, I rest as my Self”. Eckhart Tolle calls this place – “Resting in the Now”. Adyashanti, a renowed spiritual teacher in the States, calls this state of being as “Emptiness dancing”. Gauthama Buddha called this state of being as – “No self, No suffering”. Many teachers have expressed this place of being in different words and terms, but essentially this is the place you will finally end up at when you really allow your awareness to deepen inside you. Inevitably, this is where the descent of awareness in you finally rests.
How does life unfold from this place?
You will find that you are no longer pulled by any specific desire (there is no craving), but aligned desires, or thoughts of creation, arise in your mind and move towards manifestation. You will find that you are not longer willfully motivated towards any action, but all required actions will taken by your body at the right time. You will find that you are no longer holding on to any rigid beliefs or opinions, but if required you can give an opinion on a topic (though you wouldn’t feel a sense of self in the opinion). You are no longer awaiting a future experience to fulfill you. It’s almost like your body is moving through the motions of physicality while you rest in the space of “being”. Adyashanti expressed this poetically, in one of his writings, in this manner – “you become like a leaf that sways with the winds without any questions or resistance”, the wind being the movement of your life stream which is always in harmony with the totality of existence.
This is not a state of “inactivity” but a state of harmonious activity or effortless activity. You don’t become a recluse, on the contrary you might become more intimate with this world. You don’t become careless, on the contrary there is a movement of responsibility but not in the old fear based way. Your life does not become disintergrated or chaotic, on the other hand it becomes more integrated, harmonious and organized but in a totally strain free manner. Anyone who has had a taste of this place will know what I am talking about. In the path towards reaching this place, there is a phase when everything feels “disoriented” because the old way of being starts disintegrating to get to this new place of being, and this transition can be quite challenging if one’s mind interprets this process negatively.
Surrendering to this transformation
To get to this place one needs to allow awareness to touch their humanness in a deep way, allowing it to see through all the aspects of the human consciousness present in their mind space. This is one reason why the movement of awareness is sometimes referred to as an “emptying away” of the cup, because essentially what happens is that this awareness burns through all the rigid beliefs, hang ups, narrow opinions, unquestioned perceptions and false securities. Once the descent of awareness starts in a human being, it does not stop until it reaches this final resting place – if you have been resisting this movement in you, out of fear, or from the anxiety of the disorientation, I would suggest that you let go and allow yourself to surrender to this process taking place within you.
If this post did not make any sense to you, it’s totally fine because it just implies that you’ve not sensed this place yet and so cannot comprehend the dichotomy of it. We are where we are right “now” and our comprehension/understanding is always limited by our level of awareness. There was a time when I used to listen to spiritual teachers talk about this place and I thought they were preaching impractical living and was skeptical about such a possibility, it’s only through my own personal experience of this place that I realize the essence of what they were pointing at. I am sure there may be some readers who are going through this inner transformation, and moving towards this state of being, and this post may serve as an assurance that a very positive process is taking place in them.