A Deeper Understanding of Wholeness

Posted on by Sen.

The state of wholeness may very well look like a “light natured” state on the outside, in many ways, but in truth it’s far more deeper than a light natured state. The experience of wholeness and the experience of joy are two different feelings altogether – joy is a purely light natured state, whereas wholeness is the balanced state that you come to when you’ve managed to integrate the dark and light energy in you. You must understand that the way I use the words like light, dark, positive, negative and wholeness are totally contextual to my way of defining them – some other teacher/writer may use the same words to point to some other context, for example some teachers may use the word “light” to define a state of wholeness/balance, and “dark” to define a state of imbalance. Whereas, I use the word “wholeness” (as well as “pure positive”) to define the state of balance, and light/dark as the two polarities of life-energy, and “negative” as a state of imbalance toward either polarities. It’s important to be clear about the context in which a writer uses his/her words because some words can take different meanings depending on how it’s used.

The missing link in most teachings that end up giving an incomplete understanding is that they use words like positive and negative in a black and white manner, asking you to avoid the negative and force yourself to be positive. The mind automatically assumes that by “negative” they are talking about the dark nature components, and hence starts trying to suppress this component through force, trying to cloak it with imposed positivity (light nature) of some form – this is when you start becoming “polarized” towards one nature, and this always leads to an imbalance of some form. “Suppression” is not the way to freedom ever, it only leads to imbalance, no matter what you try suppress in yourself – for example, when you try to suppress fear, you become more fearful, when you try to suppress sadness, you attract more sadness (because indirectly you are fearing sadness and your fear of it is like a direct interest/focus towards it). The way to wholeness is in the state of allowing, both, the light and dark nature components in you, till they balance out each other, thus coming to wholeness (also called “unity consciousness”). Oneness in it’s true meaning is to realize that dark and light are two polarities of the same “one” energy, and the only way to experience a state of wholeness is to integrate both these components in you.

The state of wholeness is a different experience altogether, it’s difficult to explain this place clearly without giving some imagination of it being “light natured” – I can use terms like stability, balance, peaceful joy, unshakeable calm, a causeless love, etc and they all ultimately look like “light natured” states but their experience is far deeper than any light natured state. When one is polarized towards a light natured state of being, one is in opposition to the dark natured components, and this opposition by itself is rooted in fear (or separation/dualistic thinking) and hence is not a state of oneness, it’s not a state of wholeness – it may feel “good”, for a while, but you will know that something is missing. In a state of wholeness you inherently know that nothing is missing, you feel home, you feel stable, you feel full-filled.

A state of wholeness is neither dark nor light

When you truly sense wholeness, you also sense that it doesn’t have the flavor of dark nature or the flavor of light nature – it has a flavor unique to itself. This is one reason why a lot of teachers say that it’s difficult to explain this state with words because all words are taken by the mind and referenced to some state that it already knows of, but since wholeness is a state that it has not tasted it does not have a reference for it and hence it always misunderstands the words. When I, now, see different teachers talking about this state of wholeness while using other words like oneness, love, light, divine or merging, I totally get what they are talking about because my mind has a reference for it, because of personal experience, but I remember totally misinterpreting the same teachings when I did not have a personal reference for it – it’s very normal to do so. I always misinterpreted these teaching to imagine that they were pointing to some light-natured state. This misinterpretation is usually the cause for endless seeking, for endless search, because you can’t experience the wholeness they talk about until you understand that they are not talking about a light-natured state but a state of balance.

When you become stabilized in a state of wholeness, you don’t sense any dark nature component in you individually, neither do you sense any light nature component in you individually – it’s like a different dimension of living. The feelings that you had when you were in a state of imbalance, and the feelings you have when you are in a state of wholeness are completely different experiences altogether, a totally new flavor. For example, the anger you feel in the state of wholeness is nothing like the anger you feel in a state of imbalance – this anger does not have the feel of the past anger as such, it’s difficult to even label it as anger. The same way the joy that you feel in a state of wholeness is completely different from the joy of the state of imbalance, it has a completely different taste to it. In one sense, you really don’t sense any dark or light components individually anymore, they are both merged fully and coherently into one. This is the place you will ultimately find yourself in as you move towards allowing the integration of the dark and light in you (by simply staying in state of total allowing).

As you reach the state of wholeness you start experiencing several inner changes, it’s like an unlocking of various pockets that were closed down before. These inner changes may be physical (like healing, change of skin tone etc), it may be at a mental level (change of personality, increased brain acumen etc) and of course at the emotional level in the way you experience relationships of all forms. If you have some knowledge of Chakra system in the body, it’s said that humans mostly abide in the lower three chakras in a state of imbalance, while a movement towards the state of wholeness opens up the upper four chakras, and above – but these are just details, you don’t have to be too concerned about it, rest assured that a state of total allowing automatically rings in the required changes (be it physical, emotional or mental) towards wholeness. You will surely see a lot of physical changes in you (many of you might have experience your body feeling “lighter” or feeling transparent/spacious within, this is because your cells have become less dense and thus more transparent), internally and externally, along with changes in your level of perception and your emotional equation, it’s like being “upgraded” to a new version of software and hardware.

What type of reality is manifested in a state of wholeness?

You may wonder how realities can co-exist on Earth between humans who are becoming balanced and humans who are still imbalanced, when the latter is mostly in the majority. The truth is that Earth (also called Gaia), as a celestial consciousness, is by itself evolving towards a higher vibration state, akin to “wholeness”, as a natural movement of growth/evolution (they say there is a cycle of evolution every 26,000 years, but that’s just details). The vibration of Earth and its atmosphere is now more suited for vibrations close to wholeness than starkly imbalanced vibrations, and hence people who are heavily imbalanced feel the pressure, even more these days, to move into balance. There are many scientific studies that have detailed a change in Earth’s energy field as well as the solar energy field, over the past few years, almost as if it’s moving into a new state of being (which it is). You are bound to see a lot of people (and corporations) moving towards balance in the next few months, in many ways, through their own journeys, and the vibe on Earth would come towards a state of wholeness as a majority. This vibe will ensure that realities based in wholeness are of the dominant nature on Earth – and I am not talking about years, I am talking about a few months for you to see this change.

However, right now is a “transition period”, and like any transition period there is a feeling of uncertainty and even a feeling of chaos. This is normal, and it serves a purpose towards breaking down set patterns of purely egoistic/separatist thinking, imbalanced structures of belief (and realities created from them) and narrow perspectives. A lot of humans are having their wake up calls, either through events happening in their life or through episodes of sudden fear coming up in their mind, you may wonder why you are having so many fearful thoughts out of the blue – rest assured, these are all just wake up calls, nothing more, and their intention is simply to awaken your awareness so that you can balance out to match the vibration that Earth is moving towards. Instead of trying to suppress these wake up calls, surrender to them by coming to a place of allowing and you will allow the inner transformation that’s being called for – it’s all a movement towards a greater well-being, of wholeness. Your mind might get into a panic, as the old patterns start getting shaken up, and say “something’s going wrong”, but the opposite is the truth – a new order of living is being established, a new vibe of existence, a new state of consciousness based in oneness.

If you are feeling uncertain, and confused, about where your life is headed, as all your old realities and thought patterns lose their hold, just be rest assured that it’s just a temporary phase of “reconstruction”, and you will see stability in your external reality soon enough. For now, in the next few months, just focus more on bringing an inner stability by being grounded more in allowing than in trying to “sort it out”. You will look back upon these times and realize that it was a necessity to ring in a new reality. I totally understand the challenges that your mind may be facing with respect to the fear of the unknown, moving into the unfamiliar domain of this new vibe (having only known the vibe of imbalance all along), but this is just a temporary unease, you will soon feel grounded in this new vibe and you will see your realities reflecting the same wholeness you experience within. Realities created in a state of wholeness have a “harmonious” feel to them, there is no stark contrast, and the interplay of light and dark is hardly of any intensity, and these realities are “malleable” allowing you to shift easily into new ones, no longer having these feeling of being “stuck” (which is so common in the dense realities created in imbalance).

It’s not that I am being an “optimist” or an idealistic, I am neither. I am just stating what I sense as the natural movement which is taking place. One of the advantages of being in a state of wholeness is that you have no resistance to the “insights” that come from within, the knowing that comes through from your inner being (which has the top view) – hence you are well informed of where you are heading, and this brings a sense of security which is not rooted in some blind faith but in a certain knowing.

Don’t fight the inner change

A lot of people have resistance to becoming “different”, because they feel vulnerable about leaving their past identity/personality. Whereas, some people are so fed up with their past identity that they welcome the change unequivocally. The latter are the ones who allow this process of inner transformation seamlessly, while the former are constantly at odds with it. For example, a lot of dark natured people don’t want to give up some of their dark natured traits, like their aggressiveness (which they think is needed for their defense against the world), however you can’t move into wholeness while holding on to a dark natured trait. Another example would be of a light natured person who feels immensely guilty about allowing the dark components like “hatred” in him/her, trying to hold on to this sense of being all loving, one can’t move into wholeness while holding on to such light natured beliefs. One can say that wholeness is a state of being all loving, but love has a totally different flavor in this state, it’s not the same experience as what you have when you are imbalanced towards light nature.

I think humility plays a big role is how receptive one is towards allowing inner change. The only problem is that most arrogant people think they are humble, and their “fake” humility is just a mask they wear to protect their arrogance. True humility has an openness to it, it’s not standing on guard, it’s not holding an armor, it’s like an open hand, it’s not a closed fist – it’s not meekness, there is a strength in it, openness requires true courage. You either allow humility or your learn humility the hard way, these are the only two options I’ve seen in my own personal experience (and I was rooted in the latter for a long time). Don’t be so opposed to letting your guard down, at least with yourself, don’t be so terrified of finding out how frightened you really are within, allow this fear – courage is not about fighting fear, it’s your capacity to allow fear. It’s this state of allowing that brings you seamlessly to a place of wholeness.


  1. abet

    this is so amazing, rings so true!

  2. Joy


    1. Joy

      Somehow, this post made new pointer for me… ~an open hand~ (an openness in inner space)

  3. Nico

    A really interesting site.

  4. Dancer

    Dear Sen, I am finding myself in many of the transitional states that you describe in your posts. At some point of my career (I am a dancer) I had a strong desire for joyful and struggle-less way of exercising my profession. Since that moment I have been led down the path that you point out as coming to the place of allowing, maturing, coming to balance. At the same time, objectively, I have lost many of the old relationships and structures and find myself currently in a place where “nothing is happening”. As you mentioned in one of your posts, I have created a situation in my life that could be labelled “a nightmare” from a certain point of view. I have beautiful visions of my career as I desire it, yet right now I feel to be at the ground level. My mind is telling me, panicking, that I should get out there, be in action, find opportunities. My heart is telling me to align with my desires and do nothing unless inspired. This is very challenging, as it is a totally different way of living for me. It feels often like waiting or like things “are not happening”. I am continuing the inner work of releasing the resistances to my desires (such as my fear of not surviving financially, my fears of not finding work, of not becoming successful). I am allowing all the feelings of unworthiness and hopelessness and frustration and depression. I feel I am in-between realities. My old reality and identity have dissipated. Some new realities have come into place, yet my most cherished desires are yet not manifest. At some moments I feel as if I have never been this far from my desires and that it is all lost and without hope; at some other moments I feel I have never been this close, that all is well and that I know it will be as I desire. I feel so many internal changes, yet when asked “what is going on in your life” I have to say, very little. Whereas my desire is to be very busy with my profession, my desires is for things happening, travels, work, performances, excitement, dynamics, relationships. Could you comment on this? Is this a “lull” you have experienced yourself? Giving up on my desire feels like giving up on life, and I do not wish to do that. I love my vision. I love what I do. I love how I do it. I know that the “hopelessness” of my situation is just a judgement of the mind. I know that internally I have come a very long way. I often feel just on the brink of the new life and career I desire. I often feel as if my new vibration and my old vibration both play out in me, keeping me in this place of “nothing happening”.

    1. Sen Post author

      As you see, these feelings of unworthiness and frustration have always been around in some way within you, and it’s only in this place of allowing that you are able to face upto to them and thus allow their release. So this is not a phase of “lull”, but a phase of a lot inner growth and maturing, which is integral to the expression that you desire to live. Don’t see this as a phase of inactivity, rather it’s phase of preparing the inner foundation for a living an aligned life – you will notice that you are well taken care of during this phase, though the mind keeps fearing that nothing much is happening.

  5. Susan

    Allowing hope to build in….once more, in spite of fear, of uncertainty, of sadness….allowing openess to be. Thank you 🙂

    1. Sen Post author

      Susan, a deeper pointer is to realize that it’s not about building hope, but about allowing a sense of hopelessness also, if it arises, instead of fighting it. If you “try” to be hopeful, it will be an effort and it will become a resistance to being in a state of allowing (and hence a resistance to a release and inner transformation). When you come to a state of inner balance, you don’t need to be hopeful, you just have a clear inner knowing of your well-being automatically, without any effort on your part.

    2. Susan

      Thank you for answering my comment Sen….I believe I am beginning to allow….to have a very subtle grasp of balance, of equilibrium…..I have been having episodes of quite immense fear and doubt…..I had tried to live in what you call the light emotions, suppressing or labeling the others as evil…..which scares me profoundly…yet as I stated, I think I’m beginning to allow all as whole, it’s the best I can express myself now. 🙂

  6. george


    I am finding it difficult to observe my thoughts. I feel as though I cannot be both the thinker and the observer simultaneously. Any advice?

    1. Sen Post author

      George, I think you are getting too conceptual instead of just keeping it simple. The simple pointer of observing the mind is to allow your mind its thoughts and movements without jumping in to sort it out. The brain (mind) is a neural network which produces thoughts, you can observe your brain just like you can observe your heart beat, it’s not something complicated. Just observe your brain and sense its thoughts, without trying to sort it out, without judging it. Just doing this practice for a while will create a stronger space of awareness in you so that you are not completely lost to the mind’s pull. With time, you will grow in stability to observe the mind and let go of being identified with its negativity and thus reduce its momentum to the point where it no longer influences your being – you need to be patient and allow yourself the time to reach this stability, it’s a journey of its own, a journey of regaining inner stability.

  7. Alex

    Sen, I was directed to this article by you a few days ago and so much you say seems to be making more and more sense to me at this time in my life. Thank you. I definitely feel like I am in a transitional period, where I am beginning to see my life objectively rather than directing blame on others or the external world for my problems. In reality, there is nothing that can be blamed, because as you say this imbalance is not rooted from the outside, but from within. I am beginning to see all (or most) of my problems and difficulties come from an opposition to “what is”, founded upon false beliefs the ego adopts.
    With my anxiety, I fear judgment, but only because of the negative judgments I cast on myself. Around others, I will often feel like i NEED to be instead of just BEING. This NEED to be something around others I think is put into motion by fear. I am learning that if I stop rationalizing my problems, and tell myself they aren’t even real (which in my case they mostly never are, only self-creations) then the feelings, memories, stories, all begin to fade away and the unease goes. In this way, I am letting the NEED be. You cannot fight the opposition to “what is” as so many of us I believe do. You must understand what this opposition is; befriend it, instead of wage war with it. In doing so, you stop feeding fear’s fire.
    If I want my anxiety to leave, and true happiness to come, I believe that I should begin to act and express out of love and not fear. But the kind of love I am talking about is not one that suppresses the experience of fear, (or the experience of anything for that matter) it is the one that embraces it, and in doing so sees beyond it.
    I have said a lot, but I would be very interested in what you have to say with my post. How else can I learn to just BE, without the weight of fear and guilt? Can I ever undo this terrible conditioning and experience true happiness?

    1. Sen Post author

      Alex, just be careful not to make all this into a mental strategy any strategy is bound to become a hang up sooner or later. A pointer is useful to see a negativity and then let go of identification with it, not through fear-based ignoring but an open allowing. If you “try” to act out of love, it can easily become a mental strategy no matter how cleverly the mind tries to disguise it – the reason I say this is because I understand the mind’s capacity to make anything into a technique. The state of allowing transcends the mind, the mind is what is being allowed, so it’s not a mental strategy but a way of moving from your space of being. It will take time before you start finding a real grounding in your space of being, and when you do you will sense that you no longer need any strategies to deal with the moment, you just move from inspiration. For now just connect more with the state of allowing and allow the momentum of your mind/emotional-space to reduce.

  8. sun

    You know Sen..Sometimes i wish no language ever existed and i feel the biggest reason for all this confusion is language which leads to labels etc..So much hype …Be a strong person…Be a positive person…keep smiling ….Think positive etcetra..I think the reason all this confusion exists in out mind is because of these labels that we have all been fed with. I am really beginning to question the very importance of such teachings and labels and its quite liberating……

    trust me i find all such words pretty meaningless nowadays…

  9. La'gurl

    I’m feeling a lot more whole lately. During the transition phase, is it normal to have days where you find total allowing effortless and natural and then other days where your mind might freak out and go into a mind momentum frenzy? I’ve found total allowing to work for me, but it definitely took me sometime to get to that point. It wasn’t easy after dwelling and being imbalanced in my dark nature for so long, but now I almost feel like I’m glowing on the inside. Sometimes I can even feel energy as it goes through my body. This feeling tingles my whole body and makes me feel whole. I know that I need to stick with what works for me, but is it natural to have some days where your mind just freaks out and tries to go back to it’s old ways. I feel like my negative ego is still trying to remain in control but I’ve stopped listening to it. Is the negative ego always going to be in me in some form? Is a negative ego necessary for balance?

    1. Sen Post author

      As you progress through this process, you will reach a point where you no longer feel the force of resistance created by this movement of imbalance (which is what a negative ego is). Just let yourself to be more open to allowing rather than holding a stance of fighting the negativity as it arises within you, if you sense that you are afraid of the presence of this “negative ego” it’s an indication that you are holding an offensive stance in some way instead of being totally allowing – you will know when you hit the point of inner wholeness/balance.

  10. La'gurl

    Thank you Sen, and I feel like I’m getting closer to inner wholeness everyday. I’llet you know how my progress is going.

  11. Starlight


    Can we actually solve our problems with the conditioned mind? And is there any original thought from the conditioned mind?

    What about the wisdom that arise from inner wholeness? Does it also arise from a mind? Are there different kinds of mind, eg. conditioned and intuitive mind?

    1. Sen Post author

      starlight, instead of looking to categorize the various aspects of physical and non-physical intelligence (which is nothing but a lot of concepts) it’s more useful to simply understand that the less rooted you are in negativity the more open you are to solutions. Basically, if you simply stay in a space of total allowing, without feeling the need to struggle, or sort out, or figure out effort-fully, you will be open to allowing solutions and insights/intuitions seamlessly. Certain conditioning of the mind has its practical usefulness, but a lot of conditioning can also become patterns of limited/narrow thinking, and the more you are rooted in purely moving from your limiting conditioning (out of fear of being different) the more you resist your natural expression. The easiest way to connect with your natural expression is to connect with your space of being, through the practice of staying in a place of total allowing (read the post the power of allowing)

  12. Vaca1

    I have trouble with doubt and can’t quite figure out if it is justified or not. I try to think logically about a situation and I believe I am, but when I voice my concerns to others, it is as though I am paranoid. How do you know when your thoughts or beliefs are justified? When I see something positive, I will question it to prove it is positive. If I then, see negatives or a downside, I will question that, too. Others don’t seem to think as deeply as I. Do I quit analyzing? I have an inquisitive nature and it feels right to me, but a lot of times the results are not positive because I have delved into it much more than any other would. For instance, a new network marketing opportunity after presenting itself very positive, has moved south now because I have unanswered questions and was made to feel negative because I was over analyzing. I don’t want to get sucked into a scam and am trying to do my due diligence and think logically not emotionally.

    1. Sen Post author

      vaca, you don’t have to quit analyzing, rather what’s needed is to add a new dimension of intelligence to your mind, which is the dimension of your being’s intelligence. Right now you may be too mind-oriented in your thinking and hence you may lack the sense of feeling guided from withing, a sene of inner clarity and stability. What’s needed is that for a while you just let go of making an effort at figuring things out, and just let yourself connect with a simple space of just being, allowing your mind to think passively, allow the emotions and feelings to arise freely, but just continue resting in your being – you can do this as a practice initially, may be for 20 to 30 mins a day to start with. As you gain some grounding in your being, you will sense that you can rely of your inner guidance because you can hear its voice very clearly, you can sense that you don’t really need to move from the influence of “analytical” thinking alone, rather you can move from a deeper inspiration/intuition which does not give you an analytical reasoning rather it just gives you a solution that you can following from a place of inner trust. You will gain this sense of trusting your inner guidance as you connect more with your being, this trust is like the trust of knowing something without really analyzing it – like knowing when a business opportunity is right for you without overly analyzing it. Let the mind analyze, but you don’t have to get embroiled in the analysis, rather you just need to connect with your space of being, and allow intuitions and insights to come through, allow your mind to be touched by the intelligence of your being. You can read this post – the space of being – for more insight.

  13. Nunzio

    First and foremost I stumbled upon your website trying to find an answer to why my negative thoughts consume me. I’ve been saying for months now that i feel like i live inside my head and not in the world because i am constantly consumed with thoughts and battling these thoughts try and feel “normal” and it may work for a few hours or so but i constantly get back to square one of fighting with myself just to live. Im only 19 and daily i search for ways to enjoy life and just take in its experiences but i feel i miss out on those chances because im constantly in my mind. What I’m saying is I’m glad i found your site because although its only been a few days i feel like i have a better understanding of life and how to eventually get to where i want to be and thats in a state of total allowing and wholeness. But i do struggle with turning everything into a routine, mayb because i have ocd and am constantly having obsessive thoughts that i try ot control rather then just let be and accept these thoughts. I am getting better at it but my question really is, because personally i have trouble with this, my problem is allowing my mind to do what it wants and acceptig without interferring i read on an earlier comment that you could observe the mind just as you observe the brain and that helped me a bit, but if you have any insight on how i could really let my thoughts just flow and acccept them without interferring and tryin to “fix” them. By the way this is the easiest I’ve ever expressed myself usually my mind says things like what if you can’t express yourself and i sit there tryin to fix my brain when i should jus allow it and keep goin so i feel i am making progress, thankyou for that. If you don’t answer this just know that you inspire me because one day i want to be stable and whole like you are and its been remarkable to come to a site where i could find help, and very useful tips. Thank you for your time and I’d really appreciate your insight if you have the time.

    1. Sen Post author

      Nunzio, the state of “unconsciousness” is simply a state where a person is identified with the mind without a choice, mostly because he/she is not even aware that it’s possible to have the choice to not identify with the thoughts. You’ve just started on the journey of becoming aware of the mind (whereas previously you were mostly just lost in identification with it), and with time you will keep growing stronger in the stability of your awareness, to the point where you no longer feel at the mercy of your mind’s thoughts, rather you feel an inner freedom to letting go of being pulled in by a thought. For now, what will help is that you simply spend time practicing the state of simply sitting and allowing (may be for 20-30 mins a day initially) your emotions and your thoughts to have a free movement – all you need to do is relax your hold on your mind/body, and just let be, let the emotional energy arise freely and allow your mind to have free expression of its thoughts, since your awareness is relaxed you will see that you don’t get pulled in – I also call this the practice of relaxed awareness. It takes time before you can sense a real stability in your being/awareness, where you don’t feel pulled by the emotions or your thoughts – it’s important to not get hasty, give yourself atleast 4-5 months before you can start sensing an inner stability. OCD is simply a state of unconscious mind identification, the more one grows in stability of awareness the more the mind loses it pull on the being and hence loses its momentum (thus loses its capacity for OCD)

Comments are closed.