A very common “pep talk” advice that is given in many self-improvement seminars is that you should stop caring about what others think of you, or stop paying attention to other people’s opinions about you. On the surface level, it may seem to be a very positive way of being that you don’t care about any negative feedback given by people about you. But in truth, you could well be living in “denial” of the negativity within you that attracts people to give negative feedback to you.
If you are getting some negative feedback from your surroundings it means that something in your vibration is attracting this feedback. If you choose to live in denial of it, and pretend that you don’t care about their thoughts about you, it’s not a positive way of being but just an “inauthentic” way of being. If you have the courage to be totally authentic with yourself, you will always pay heed to the feedback you are getting from the people around you and reflect within to determine what vibration/thought-pattern in you attracted such a response from the outside.
It takes a deep honesty to recognize the negativity in you
To blame others is easy but it takes a lot of authenticity, and courage, to look within for the patterns of negativity that essentially triggered the negative feedback from outside. It’s so common for people to blame their parents, friends, spouse, government, society, culture and their upbringing, for their misfortunes and sadness but rarely would one take the responsibility to go within and trace the negative vibration in oneself that is causing the attraction of negativity in their reality.
When we are emotionally hurt by the words or actions of other people we immediately get into a “self-pity” mode and start a blame game in our mind where we place ourselves as the “good guy” and the outside element as the “bad guy”. We want to live in denial of our own negativity and want to shift blame to others because it’s convenient for the mind to do so. But this approach, though it can give some false temporary relief, is extremely shallow and will never allow you to achieve any real “growth” or maturity.
Use your external reality as a feedback mechanism
The best way to look at your external reality is as a “mirror” of your mind. If there are a lot of negative elements in your “personal” reality it just means that there are a lot of negative elements of thought in your mind/energy-space. There is no getting away from this truth no matter how hard you want to believe otherwise. The mind wants to shy away from taking full responsibility for its reality and wants to somehow believe that the negativity is “out there” and that it has nothing to do with it. But the truth always will be the external reality is just a reflection of the mind – creation always happens from inside to outside.
If there is negativity in the external world of humans, it’s because there is negativity present in the minds of us humans who make up the human consciousness – but you as an individual can be privy to a positive “personal” reality if you can sieve out the negativity in your mind and align, on a moment to moment basis, with the vibration of positivity (joy/love/peace). Your “personal” reality is your responsibility, but it’s only possible to stand true to this responsibility when one becomes “conscious” of this truth. Until then we just live in a state of “reaction” to the outside – blaming the outside for the negativity in our personal reality.
You attract the response you get from the outside
Don’t try to escape your present reality, rather try to look at it deeply and see the elements present in it. Do you get a lot of negativity from people? Do you constantly feel exploited? Do you feel that people never understand you? Are people not helpful towards you? Are people in your reality criticizing you on regular basis? These are indications of some strong negative vibrations, in the form of thought-patterns, present in “your” energy space. It’s solely your responsibility to clean up your inner space of negativity by bringing an authentic awareness to it and thus allowing it to be dissolved in the light of this intelligence. Remember that it’s not possible for negativity to assert itself in your reality if you are not “attracting” it in someway.
In order to look within, and let go of associating with the negativity of the mind, one needs to become “self aware” in a very authentic manner – this is what is meant by the awakening of consciousness in a human being. When a human brings his/her consciousness to a state of self-awareness, to the degree where he/she can start becoming deeply aware of the mind patterns and start dis-identifying with its negativity, it heralds a new way of living which is rooted in wisdom, intelligence, well-being and grace that’s the very nature of the creative energy that you are.