Why Am I Finding it Hard to Stay Present?

Posted on by Sen.



The inspiration to write this article came from a comment by Cihan on one of my previous writings “How to slow down thoughts”. Thanks Cihan.

Many people who are on the path of liberation often practice the technique of “Staying in the Now” or staying present. It’s important to understand that this practice is meant to be a “medicine” not a permanent diet. If you start using a medicine as your diet, it won’t be long before the medicine starts harming your body. A medicine is only supposed to be taken to cure an anomaly, to bring some balance, after that you need to let go of the medicine and not continue taking it as a diet.

The purpose of the practice is just to awaken your consciousness

The practice of staying present is only required for a short duration (a few months) to help you become “conscious”, or to give you a perspective beyond the mind. Once you get conscious it’s like an awakening, like waking up from a trance, after that there is no real purpose in continuing this practice of “Staying present” (or staying with your attention in the Now). Let go of this practice once it has accomplished what it was meant to accomplish, which was to wake you from being in the mind’s trance.

Usually within a few months of practicing “staying present”, your consciousness would have sufficiently woken up from the trance of the mind. When consciousness moves out of the mind, it suddenly becomes aware of itself. In other words, awareness becomes aware of itself as pure awareness, without needing any thoughts or memory for its identity. If you start “witnessing” the mind, it means that your consciousness has woken up from the mind. Once consciousness wakes up, it starts moving in automatically and starts dissociating from the mind’s trance (it can take a year or may be more before consciousness completely dissociates with the false self).

With the practice of “staying present”, you will no longer be dragged “unconsciously” by the thoughts in your mind, but that does not mean that the mind stops dragging you around so soon. It’s just that now the “dragging around” happens “consciously”, you are now aware that the mind is pulling you around – this is a phase of waking up. After this, it’s only a matter of time before your awareness sees through the strategies of the mind and thus becomes free of its influence altogether.

Don’t be too hard on yourself

The mind has a huge momentum. You have been identified with the mind for several years now, and so it has a huge forward force and attraction. If you expect to be free of mind in a few weeks time, then you are just being “unrealistic”. It’s true that some people have become free of their mind in a sudden jolt, in a day, but these instances are highly rare and in fact need a terrible “shock”, or tremendous suffering, to happen.

The most normal way that process of “liberation” proceeds is that you become free of the mind in phases, slowly but surely. It can take close to a year or even slightly more, before you can get to a place where the conditioned mind loses its influence over consciousness.

The only part where you are involved is the first step, where you make the effort to wake up consciousness. Practices like – Staying present, staying aware of the Now, focusing on your body and moving your attention away from the mind, are all techniques that cause consciousness to wake up from the mind’s trance. Once consciousness has woken up, it will start taking control and then the “Me” force is toast. The personal will starts ebbing away once consciousness starts taking over. Just let it happen.

Letting go of trying to stay in the Now

There will come a time when you must let go of all practices. Remember that all techniques, and practices, need the personal will. The goal of liberation is to be free of the personal will and not to enhance it in any way. Of course the personal will is needed initially to do the practice of staying present, but once consciousness wakes up, its time for the personal will to make its exit graciously.

Don’t make “staying present” as a permanent practice. It can start suffocating you and make you feel highly unnatural. All practices have their time and place, but sooner or later you will have to let go of them and relax into the natural flow of life by letting go of all control.

Anything within you that wants to “control” has to be let go of. The whole process is about “letting go”, it’s not about becoming good at a practice, its not about accomplishing the fear of staying in the now, its not achieving more control of the mind. The process of liberation is about letting go completely of all control, only then can the movement of life take over, only then can your natural expression start flowering through.

Are you ready to let go of control and experience the liberation that comes from embracing the “unknown”? Life will present itself to you in all its grace only when you are willing to let go of the “known”, of the conditioned mind, and embrace the pure innocence of the mystery that life is, embrace the “uncertainty”, the unknown, fully and completely. This is what “letting go” really means.




42 Comments

  1. luka

    Sen,

    Great article, I just have a question. You said that ” once consciousness wakes up, its time for the personal will to make its exit graciously.” This makes enough sense, I am just wondering, will I know once ‘consciousness wakes up’? Will it be a destinct feeling when I know its happened or will I have to question it? Thank you
    Luka

    1. Sen Post author

      As you start deepening in awareness the personal will that was prevalent in the “unconscious” (lost in the mind/conditioning) state of being starts dissolving as you start understanding reality more clearly. This happens naturally, just as you would naturally let go of an old perspective once you find resonance with a new perspective. The old way of living through struggle, effort and comparisons, starts fading away and a new way living aligned with the flow of your life-stream starts taking root. By “consciousness waking up” I don’t mean any extra-ordinary momentary experience, but rather just the gradual process of you waking up from being totally lost in the mind (moving around in an routine induced daze) and becoming more aware of the reality of who you are and the reality of life. The very fact that you want to get in touch with the wholeness of your being is an indication that your consciousness is waking up from being lost in mind’s domain – you will continue to become more and more awake, rooted in awareness, from here on.

  2. Sebastian

    Dear Sen,

    I have been a silent reader of all your articles and I read them intently. I stand in the midst of a torment and I feel hopeless. My mind weaves constant negative thoughts and I feel terrible. There have been some very difficult times in my life due to which i am here today, suffering and suffocated. I was not like this before. I remember i was so carefree and so full of life. Now my mind is always fearful, negative and full of dark thoughts. They have grown so much that I dont feel normal and healthy anymore.

    I read your article ravenously and try to seep everything inside me whatever you write. One of them is watching thoughts. Its just one month that i have been practicing this. It is difficult but somewhere inside me says that its the ultimate cure.

    My thoughts grip me and they have created so much of negativity energy and anxiety inside me that my blood pressure shoots high. I have started medication to normalise my blood pressure. I also do ‘watching thoughts meditation’ for thirty minutes every day.

    Please guide me step by step if you can donate some time to me. I want to be joyful once again. I want to free.

    Regards
    Sebastian

    1. Sen Post author

      Sebastian, you will notice that the body goes through the natural transition of being an infant, teenager, adulthood, old age, where the body constantly keeps changing it physiology. The brain/mind in the same way goes through a transition in the level of awareness it has and also its intelligence – when you are an infant or teenager, your brain hardly has much awareness, and you are privy to some innocent, but unconscious, behavior – as you mentioned you were full of joy and spirited back then, but you also had very low awareness, you were just “asleep” and joyful.

      Now your brain has developed more “awareness”, it’s as if you are “waking up”, and thus you are becoming privy to the reality of human consciousness in a deeper way, you no longer can hide in ignorance or blissful blindness, because your awareness is getting stronger and it will “see” everything in this reality as it keeps growing stronger. You now have two choices, you are either try to deny this growth and try to want to get back to your “unconscious” way by drowning yourself in distractions (like entertainment, random activities or drugs) or you can allow this transition fully and go to the other side of it where you touch a stability and wholeness. This wholeness will be much deeper than the surface-level joy that you were engaged in during your unconscious days – there is a depth to this, a maturity and a wisdom which is not present in an unconscious joyful existence.

      This whole process of transition and growth is very natural if you don’t suppress it. Just allow these fears to come up, allow the negative thoughts in the mind and instead of wanting to run back to some “good feelings” allow yourself to be open to these bad feelings, from a space of open awareness. The more allowing you are, the quicker this transition happens and the quicker you get to a stability/wholeness – the more you try to suppress or deny what arises, the longer you stay in the limbo. The simple pointer is just stay in an open allowing to what arises in you, and everything will start harmonizing on its own.

  3. Sebastian

    Dear Sen,

    Thank you so much. Your words are gripping. I wanted to ask is ‘watching thoughts meditation’ helpful in this process? I set aside time everyday in the evening for this practice. I am experiencing lot of of anxieties these days.

    I am unable to watch and dis identify with my thoughts and i get lost in their quick sand and they bring so much of anxieties in me. How can i do it? How can i stay resolved to my being a ‘watcher’? I know all the answers are there in your articles but please guide me one step at a time if you may? What are the other things i can do?

    Regards
    Sebastian

    1. Sen Post author

      Sebastian, if you are watching your thoughts out of fear of facing the intensity of your anxiety, it just means you are afraid of feeling the full brunt of the sensation of anxiety. As long as you fear something, you stay a prisoner to it. So what if you just allow yourself to feel totally anxious without holding back? Just become fully open to experiencing anxiety, the sensations of fear and the depression – don’t try to hold back or protect yourself from it. When you do this, you will soon see the “boundaries” of all these sensations, their limits, and once you see their limits you will no longer fear them. The reason we fear something is because we think it is “unlimited” or infinite, so we feel overwhelmed at the thought of facing it within us. But when you truly allow something to arise in you, you see through its limits and boundaries and hence you are no longer over-whelmed by it. “Watching thoughts” is a pointer to sense yourself as the field of awareness behind the thoughts, that’s all – it’s not meant to be used as some rigorous practice to keep track of each thought that fleets by, because not only is it unnecessary but it also makes you more “closed” in your awareness rather than being totally open and free in your awareness. Just open up fully and allow what arises to arise, and soon you will feel free in your being, you will sense your independence and power – the mind will no longer be a source of fear to you.

  4. Sebastian

    Thank you Sen. Thank you so much. I believe that God is helping me through you, guiding me through you. I am amazed at your understanding of mind. Its been so many years i have been suffering because of my not able to surrender. I have been warding off all my fears and today they come as an army with all their sharpened weapons. I have been cringing and running away from them.

    You are right. I must surrender with all my boldness.

    I am writing down the steps that i have grasped from your reply:

    1) I must learn to allow, every thought that comes to me and not ward it off.

    2) While allowing them, i must try to watch them and feel them in me.

    Are these steps right?

    God bless

    Sebastian

    1. Sen Post author

      Sebastian, there is no need to “try” anything – just stay in a space of open awareness and allow what arises to arise in the mind and in your emotional space. It’s not a technique, it’s just openness. All techniques stem from a place of deep fear towards the mind and its negativity. Openness is like unconditional love, whereas techniques have a vibration of “hatred” because we are ultimately using it to “try” and get rid of something. The attitude of “getting rid” of something never works, because it’s rooted in fear/hatred. When you bring an unconditional openness to what arises, no matter how stark the negativity, it soon dissolves in force and transmutes into the natural vibration of life, which is wholeness.

  5. Sebastian

    Dear Sen,

    Thank you. Thank you for helping me. What i have gathered from your replies is that i need not fight anything. I must stay like an open field, like that stream of water that flows. Thank you so much.

    God bless
    Sebastian

  6. Sebastian

    Dear Sen,

    Once again i want to thank you for helping me. Also please guide me in what awareness means here to me? in my context? How can i stay open as an open space of awareness? How do we do that? Especially when those obsessive thoughts of negativity and fear cloud me? How?

    Please guide me in this.

    Regards
    Sebastian

    1. Sen Post author

      Sebastian, something within you already understands what it means to be “open” to what arises, to be fully allowing. However, the mind always asks “how” because the mind is always looking for a technique to hold onto – but any technique you hold onto is still a “holding on”, it’s not being fully open. Do you sense that you got what it meant to be fully allowing, and then the mind came up again with the “how” because it wanted to fixate on some technique to protect itself against the brunt of feelings and intensity of thoughts that arise? For a while it’s unpleasant to just be open to all the low vibration energy and thoughts that are arising in you, as a part of your negative momentum that has been gathered over years. But if you continue staying open to allowing it all to arise, they will soon start dissolving force, like a detox a lot of toxicity comes up to be released, after which there is a lightness in your being.

    2. Abhyasi

      Thanks Sen, I see what you are explaining here, I have felt that, something within me already understand “to be open” when fear arises.
      I try to be open to any fear that arises but it becomes difficult to fall sleep when I try to be open at bedtime. Next day, when I wake I still feel the pinch of fear is still there but the intensity has gone down. Deep down within me I could sense that all fears are temporary and will go sooner or later but, I still get anxious now and then. Can you please advice if is this the part of the process?

    3. Sen Post author

      Abhyasi, it’s very normal to feel this way while you are in the middle of the transition towards inner stability. Till you come to a full stability with, or what I would call full awakeness, you continue to feel uncertain now and then. Allow this also and be open to feeling this way.

  7. Sebastian

    Dear Sen,

    Thank you. Thank you for being there with all of us who are communicating with you. When i read the comments of people who are in touch with you, i feel that i am not alone. Your understanding is so consistent and uncomplicated.
    To be open means to be open and nothing more and nothing less. I am in my office and whenever i get to read your comments and articles i feel rejuvenated.

    Your comments are unique and selfless.

    All my respect and regards to you. Please be there whenever any speck blocks my road to openness.

    Thank you

    Sebastian

  8. Sebastian

    Dear Sen,

    As I begin now to live in the openness, I must share with you that since so many years i have been experiencing these constant bombardment of thoughts. Sometimes they became dormant and i felt relieved, but i always stayed in that fear and inconfidence that what if they come up again. But since more than a month, these constant obsession of thoughts in my mind have created so much of fear and anxieties that i even find it difficult to go to work or do anything, as if i am shackled with chains and burdened with a heavy weight on my heart. Earlier they came up and died for a long time, but this time they are not becoming dormant like they used to.

    I have been through some very tough phases in my life and i believe that is the reason i have been wounded in this way. I was never so insecured, negative and fearful.

    I want to be free now and live in joy. God has blessed with so much abundance around me and i want to breathe it, feel it and enjoy it.

    Please guide me.

    Regards
    Sebastian

    1. Sen Post author

      Sebastian, the simple pointer is this – “Anything you allow fully loses its hold on you”. So if fear has a hold on you it’s simply because you are trying to escape fear, if insecurity has a hold on you it’s simply because you are trying to escape insecurity, if negativity has a hold on you it’s because you are trying to escape negativity. Stop trying to escape, stop living like a kid who is afraid of watching horror movies – and realize that you are now a grown up adult who can have the courage to stop running away from the mind no matter how fearful its thought. Can you be courageous enough to just allow all the fears of the mind without looking for a escape route or a “short cut” solution? The courage to be fully allowing is the solution because this is what takes you to freedom – as long as you live in fear of the mind you are its prisoner, and there is no “short cut” technique to become free of the fear, you have to go through the phase of allowing fear fully in order to transcend its influence on you.

  9. Sebastian

    Dear Sen,

    Thank you so much. Thank you once again for the valuable comments . You are right, I have been running away from my fears, my insecurities and negativity.

    Simply allowing and surrendering is what i need to be free. Is there anything more i can do? Just asked because i have been practicing breathing meditation…i.e. focusing on the inhale and exhale and watching thoughts as a bystander. I know you have already told me about the futility of it. But after doing that…i feel light and relaxed for sometime.

    Will it not add to calming down my mind…even more or will it aggravate my state?

    Please answer.

    Regards
    Sebastian

    1. Sen Post author

      Sebastian, as you can see these techniques can give “temporary relief” and make you feel light and relaxed for a while – but it’s not very different from the relief a drug addict feels by numbing the mind for a while with chemicals. He is using chemicals, you are using breath control – the difference is only in the technique used. None of this is truly going to take you to a place of wholeness, freedom and stability, because you are using these techniques to escape the surge of negativity happening in your mind. The only way to go beyond the negativity is to allow it fully in your openness, without trying to escape it. Obviously it feels unpleasant when it arises, but as I as said, you are grown up enough handle this small discomfort for a while – all your techniques ultimately are just means to escape this temporary discomfort, and hence you keep seeking temporary relief.

  10. Sebastian

    Dear Sen,

    I got it. Thank you so much. I fully agree with you. Thank you so much once again!

    Regards
    Sebastian

  11. Sebastian

    Dear Sen,

    Its been sometime and i could feel that relief as you said that i need to stay open and let fearful thoughts arise without running away or cringing from them. I do feel that relief by staying open and surrendered.

    I need to tell you that over so many years of running away and feeling fearful, my mind has started acting stupid for eg. “Like when i am walking, my mind tends to be very careful as I might not step on some stone or something that has black magic or what if anybody does some black magic on me and i get worse…all these kinds of fictitious imaginations….but when i remember your statement, i again feel it inside me and stay in openness.

    Especially there are times when i am exhausted and feeling low, i tend to get negative and get overpowered with thoughts like what if i again get eclipsed by those fears and fearful thoughts. Mind you, those fearful thoughts are not actually fearful but i fear because of their compulsive coming into my mind, their repitition is what i get fearful of.

    Please guide me

    Regards
    Sebastian

  12. Ketan

    I just wanted to thank all you guys for coming up with these questions, I find myself in them and relieved that I am not the only one who is going through it. Thanks for your courage to share it. And most importantly thanks Sen for guiding us through this most important journey…. thanks!

  13. Paddy

    Dear Sen! I don’t remember whether you have a post about mindfulness or mindfulness practice. I read somewhere that mindfulness meditation helps with negative thoughts.

    1. Sen Post author

      Paddy, mindfulness just means “being aware of the mind”, so mindfulness meditation is just about watching the mind as a detached observer. This practice is useful in helping you growing in the power of awareness so that you are no longer lost in the mind’s pull. Once you have a strong awareness it’s easier to get into the phase of total allowing of the mind and release of suppressed energy – for more insights you can read this post – Reaching a place of total allowing

  14. Sebastian

    Dear Sen,

    Its been sometime and i could feel that relief as you said that i need to stay open and let fearful thoughts arise without running away or cringing from them. I do feel that relief by staying open and surrendered.

    I need to tell you that over so many years of running away and feeling fearful, my mind has started acting stupid for eg. “Like when i am walking, my mind tends to be very careful as I might not step on some stone or something that has black magic or what if anybody does some black magic on me and i get worse…all these kinds of fictitious imaginations….but when i remember your statement, i again feel it inside me and stay in openness.

    Especially there are times when i am exhausted and feeling low, i tend to get negative and get overpowered with thoughts like what if i again get eclipsed by those fears and fearful thoughts. Mind you, those fearful thoughts are not actually fearful but i fear because of their compulsive coming into my mind, their repitition is what i get fearful of.

    Please guide me this one last time.

    Regards
    Sebastian

    1. Sen Post author

      Sebastian, ultimately as long as you feel that your mind is more powerful than your awareness you are bound to feel “unpredictable” within, and hence feel fearful of the next thing the mind is going to pop up. Actually it’s not the mind that’s the problem, it’s about your habit of taking it so seriously, it’s also about your attitude of fearing everything the mind says or analyzing everything that your mind says, the problem is also with you holding onto several fearful ideas about life instead of understanding the well-being inherent to your life-stream. When you understand that your life-stream is always moving towards your well-being, and that if you are simply not attached to negative thinking, you will always be in the flow of well-being, then you realize that there is no need or necessity to sit and analyse negative thoughts like black magic or evil eye or whatever – it’s just a waste of energy and time. Your life-stream has the intelligence to bring you towards your desired reality, and be a constant source well-being for you at every moment, allowing for a highly abundant and pleasant experience of life – all that’s need is that you consciously let go of your pre-occupation with thinking from a fear-based place, ultimately it’s just habit that you’ve developed over the years and you can let go of it consciously. You don’t have to force yourself to think positive, you just have to let go of clinging to negative thinking and your habit of fearing it. Allowing the mind the freedom to voice anything it wants, why sit worrying about what your mind will think next? It’s like worrying about what a radio station will play next. If the mind gets noisy, just allow it to have this movement without the need to sort it out, it will lose momentum on its own.

  15. Suvd

    Sen I want to ask you something. Do you believe we have a predetermined destiny or we create our destiny?

  16. Sebastian

    Dear Sen,

    Thank you so much for replying. Whatever i have gathered from your replies only comes to the essence is that i must surrender. To allow what arises without fighting or fearing about it. Allow, surrender, let go, open are all the condensed conclusions that i have drawn from all what you have said.

    Thank you Sen, God bless.

    Sincere regards and best wishes
    Sebastian

  17. Sebastian

    Dear Sen,

    I have to thank you for helping me by your valuable comments. I do not want to be a bother to you every now and then but i think i must write to you. You commented that i must allow what arises to arise, may you please elaborate on it so that i can learn as to how i must go about it, may you please guide me more on this, i will be truly grateful.

    Thanks

    Regards
    Sebastian

  18. Sebastian

    Dear Sen,

    Thank you for yours posts and giving me the links to my queries. Udergoing the process of completely allowing will take me to the state of freedom. The constant pounding of my thoughts in my mind are torturous. They dont have any meaning but due to their constant coming i have developed fears. My mind always finds wherever i am and whatever i am doing and I am allowing them now.

    Please keep writing to me 0r forwarding links connected to my state.

    Regards
    Sebastian

    1. Sen Post author

      Sebastian, it’s just an indication of the process of release which is underway, in this post – reducing mind momentum is the key – I discussed about how these symptoms of unpleasantness are to be expected and one just needs to ride through it without getting overly worried about it by understanding that what’s happening is a positive process of release. Allow yourself to be open to the low state that you may be experiencing right now, it’s challenging for sure, but if you can keep yourself totally open to this release it will break through a lot of the inner resistances/fears in your being.

  19. Sebastian

    Dear Sen,

    There is one very important thing i forgot to mention. Since months due to the pounding of obsessive thoughts, i developed lot of anxiety. Due to this i have started taking anti anxiety medicines. Due to think this will be a hinderance to my being in the state of allowing? Please let me know so that i can do what is right and in sync with the process of total allowing. Please guide me whether i should continue or stop these medications!

    Regards
    Sebastian

    1. Sen Post author

      You will need to follow your own inspiration with regards to the medications, eventually the bottom-line is that any external crutch will keep you from being consciously free but sometimes a temporary crutch may be needed to deal with a present state of mind. You can look at staving off gradually as you sense your mind momentum reducing.

  20. Sebastian

    Dearest Sen,

    Thank you so much. Thank you for replying to my query…everytime i had asked.
    I am truly grateful to you. Thank you very much.

    Regards
    Sebastian

  21. sebastian

    Dear Sen,

    I am opening up and letting go everything. So much of negativity and packed fears are shaking me. Now my mind has started creating doubts. My mind has started doubting my relationship and trust in Jesus and my faith in Him as i am on my way follwing you. Sometimes my mind says that you are His medium to help me and sometimes it says that i should not take off my eyes from Jesus and have faith in his healing grace.

    I want to believe that God works through people and He is working in me through you to heal me, guiding me on how to go about it.

    Sen, please speak and break this state of limbo in me.

    Regards

    Sebastian

    1. Sen Post author

      Sebastian, the mind will keep creating fears/doubts and if you keep giving in to them you will only delay your progress towards true inner freedom. Trying to reassure the mind all the time is not really the path towards inner freedom, you need to develop the inner power to let go of your mind’s pull on you instead of being so fearful towards its thoughts. Jesus was a great teacher, and his pointer was always towards teaching everyone that who we are is no different from who he was, “we are made in the image of god” is what his core pointer was, he didnot say “I am god, follow me”, he said “you are all gods, connect with your true nature, stop being so deluded” – of course a fear-based mind always wants to be a follower, and it’s evident in how religion has become the means to cater to this fear-based mindset. Letting go of the momentum of negativity (the pull) of your mind is all it takes for you to find inner stability and connection with your inner wisdom (this is what Jesus pointed to as the kingdom of heaven within you) – he did not say, “be in fear of me, pray to me and follow me”, he said – “know that the kingdom of heaven is within you, and you have as much access to it as I have because you and I are the same”. Instead of trying to understand his pointers (or the pointers given by any other teacher) if you make it about following him or following some other teacher it defeats the point altogether – no different from living through fear-based trust in a religion. Sitting in faith can have several undertones of meekness and fear embedded in it, instead find your true power by letting go of clinging to a fear-based thought.

  22. sebastian

    Dear Sen,

    Thank you so much. Thank you for taking out time always and listening to my queries. I am truly thankful to you for your selfless reasons of answering me whenever I have called.

    Bible says in 2 Corinthians 12:9 “My grace is sufficient for you for my Power is Made Perfect in Weakness”. Only through our weaknesses we are churned and moulded the best and I have read one of your articles that also says that fearful mind is the ticket to liberation….and you also said that the meekness that comes from allowing, letting go or surrendering has a strength in it. This is how we are made perfect through our weakness….isn’t it?

    Thank you so much Sen for your unselfish spirit for my questions.

    God bless
    Regards
    Sebastian

  23. Bill

    I was originally awoken by an Autistic child a couple of years ago now, with minimal activity in my mind since then. Since reading your post and practicing the techniques I can feel this similar brain activity happening quite frequently and seemingly more powerfully. I’m curious does this stop at a point , or is this a sign of immaturity and I am simply building neurological pathways of sorts? Do you know this sensation i am even refering to? Thanks in advance.

    1. Mark

      Hi Bill,

      If you are practicing “staying in the now”, or your awareness have grown stronger, this activity that you are talking about is normal. I also have the same situation, the cause is your awareness is getting stronger moment by moment, when it’s already strong enough, it will automatically aware of the deeper imbalances in you. So you can start releasing the new layer of imbalance, the release happens in layers, so dont be surprise if for a period of time your mind is very calm, silent ant peace then suddenly the next it goes back to noisy again. This process does have an end, you can feel the change inside you slowly.

      Hope this help

  24. Bill

    Mark, I had thought that was maybe what was happening. I find staying in the “now” is quite helpful with releasing past energies, and yes, I now seem to be coming aware of these imbalances inside me, and can actually feel them release. As Sen had said, this period of being uncomfortable will almost certainly be worth it once I can establish some balance and progress to live conciously, consistantly. Quite helpful indeed thanks for your mindfullneess ! tC

  25. Mandus

    Hello everyone! I really enjoyed reading all these comments. I’m 15 years old and can relate to what you are saying. I don’t understand what you mean by teenagers having lower awareness, I hope this is just a thought of norm. These past few days have been very new and crazy. One day, I was sitting in my bed, totally drowned in my thoughts and started crying. I cried for about an hour and then instantly stopped, I realized that I was the only one in charge of stopping the madness and therefor did so. The day after was excellent, I felt amazing. I was sure that everyday in my life would be just as great. The day after I got just as cought up in my mind. I didn’t know what to do and I found it very hard to surrender to the now. I went to bed, woke up to this day and felt almost the same as yesterday. After reading a couple of pages in The power of Now, I had a beautiful moment (such as the one the day after I cried). But soon it ended. I really appreciate your words about being open and allowing everything to rise within. Thank you all so much for your comment. We are all in this process together. Love and light.

    /Mandus

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